next week 8/31

New and notable in the week ahead… procrastinator picks are underlined.

Monday

  • CMA Music Festival (ABC, 8pm) – Do Kenny Chesney and Taylor Swift make you want to tune in?
  • Greek (ABCFam, 9pm) Season Premiere – So glad to be heading back to school and not just for another chance for Casey and Cappie, you know his rejection won’t last for long.
  • Ultimate Cake Off (TLC, 10pm) – Arg, let the pastry chef’s bake off in the cake off with a pirate theme.

Tuesday

  • Andrew Zimmern’s Bizarre World (Trav, 10pm) Series Premiere – How bizarre will first stop Cuba be?
  • Rehab (Tru, 10pm) Season Premiere – I don’t know if this party at the Hard Rock hotel has anything to do with actual rehab.
  • Surviving Disaster (Spike, 10pm) Series Premiere – Will watching this show make me feel more or less fearful?

Wednesday

  • CBS Fall Preview (CBS, 8:30pm) – The cast of How I Met Your Mother hosts the display of what’s to come.
  • Glee (Fox, 9pm) – In case you missed the pilot at the end of last season tune in tonight (or tomorrow) to prepare for the season to come.

Thursday

  • Football (Fox, 7pm) – Tonight is repeatapalooza unless you want to watch some exhibition football.

Friday

  • Eureka (Syfy, 11pm) – In case you missed the start of this amusing show, you can tune in for the pilot and some marathon action to catch up.

Saturday

  • At the Movies (ABC, 6:30pm*) Season Premiere – The balcony is open again but this season former guest hosts NY Times AO Scott joins Chicago Tribune’s Michael Phillips as new regulars.

Sunday

  • Tennis (Sat/Sun, CBS, 8am) – The US Open kicks off on Monday but moves from ESPN2 to network for the Labor Day weekend, will it be favorites Federer and Serena?

*Check your local listings.

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next week 8/24

New and notable in the week ahead… procrastinator picks are underlined.

Monday

  • Make it or Break it (ABCFam, 11am) – If you missed this new series, and not by choice, they’re doing a marathon leading up to the finale.
  • The Rachel Zoe Project (Brav, 10pm) Season Premiere – Have to admit that I like fashion but I’d rather look at the outfits she puts together than hear her speak.

Tuesday

  • Frankie & Neffe (BET, 10:30pm) Series Premiere – Mother and sister of Keyshia Cole try to make it on their own, sort of.
  • Saving Grace (TNT, 11pm) – For those of you who accidently had your tivos set to only save five episodes the first of season 3 starts in again.

Wednesday

  • Crash Course (ABC, 9pm) Series Premiere – Dan Cortese and Orlando Jones host this latest reality competition, this one has pair driving.

Thursday

  • Marked (Hist, 9pm) Series Premiere – Exploring the history of the tattoo.
  • Rob Dyrdek’s Fantasy Factory/Bully Beatdown/Nitro Circus/Pranked (MTV, 9/9:30/10/10:30pm) Season/Series Premieres – Skate dudes, pros fight bullies, motor cross dudes, and pranks from the web.

Friday

  • CMT Comedy Stage Presents Terry Fator (CMT, 10pm) – Desperate for something to note, there is a comedian I’ve never heard of on a channel I’ve never watched, live from Las Vegas.

Saturday

  • Beach Volleyball (NBC, Sat/Sun, 11:30am) – The men bring it from Chicago on Saturday and the women return on Sunday.
  • The 25th Anniversary of Wrestlemania (NBC, 9pm) – Mickey Rourke makes a guest appearance as they look back on lots of wrestly goodness.
  • 24/7 (HBO, 10:15pm) Season Premiere – Marquez and Mayweather work it out.

Sunday

  • Fox Fall Preview (Fox, 4pm) – What will be the faves next season?
  • CW Fall 2009 Preview Special (CW, 6:30pm) – Laura Leighton and Thomas Callabro talk about all things fall including of course Melrose Place.
  • Daytime Emmy Awards (CW, 7/8pm) – First the stars arrive and then Vanessa Williams hosts the show with Sesame Street getting a lifetime achievement award.
  • NBC Primetime Preview (NBC, 8:30pm) – Can you say Leno at 10, I bet they can.
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next week 8/10

New and notable in the week ahead… procrastinator picks are underlined.

Monday

  • Teen Choice Awards (Fox, 8pm) – Jonas Brothers, Miley Cyrus, High School Musical… I am too old to enjoy this.
  • Lords of the Revolution (VH1, 8pm) Series Premiere – The 60s and 70s had a new series worth of icons to profile starting with Muhammad Ali.

Tuesday

  • Swords (Disc, 9pm) Series Premiere – Another take on reality shows following jobs, this time swordfish fishermen.
  • Daddy’s Girls (MTV, 10/10:30pm) Season Premiere – More family reality.
  • Primetime (ABC, 10pm) Season Premiere – A look at the dude who you’ll see on Into the Pride starting Thursday.

Wednesday

  • Man vs. Wild (Disc, 9pm) Season Premiere – Arctic Circle anyone?
  • Criss Angel: Mindfreak (A&E, 10pm) Season Premiere – I’m still not sure I’d want the word freak in the title of my show.
  • Dinner Impossible (Food, 10pm) Season Premiere – This one’s called ‘Roller Derby Debacle.’
  • Hard Knocks Training Camp (HBO, 10pm) Season Premiere – Checking in on training camp with the Cincinnati Bengals

Thursday

  • Into the Pride (AnPl, 8/9pm) Series Premiere – The dude with lions in Namibia that you could learn about Tuesday on Primetime.
  • American Loggers (Disc, 9pm) Season Premiere – Freezing temperatures can throw a wrench into the system.

Friday

  • Neil Diamond (CBS, 8pm) – Hot August night…

Saturday

  • Alli Dew Tour (NBC, Sat/Sun, 1pm) – The action sports hit Portland for the Wendy’s Invitational.
  • Househusbands of Hollywood (FRC, 9pm) Series Premiere – So a couple of  ‘celebrities’ have husbands who are now making money for not making money I think.

Sunday

  • Kourtney & Khloe/Reality Hell (E!, 10/10:45pm) Series Premieres – More reality…
  • Mad Men (AMC, 10pm) Season Premiere – I may just start watching this series, time to dust of the netflix.
  • My Antonio (VH1, 10pm) Series Premiere – Antonio Sabato Jr is the latest to attempt to pretend to find true love with a gaggle of girls.
  • P. Diddy’s Starmaker (MTV, 10pm) Series Premiere – Fourteen aspiring competitors try to survive to be made into a star.
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next week 7/27

New and notable in the week ahead… procrastinator picks are underlined.

Monday

  • Bachelorette (ABC, 8pm) Season Finale – Is this the one that sticks? After the Final Rose is Tues at 10.
  • Making His Band (MTV, 10pm) Series Premiere – Diddy is tired of sitting on the sidelines.

Tuesday

  • Dragon’s Den (BBCA, 9pm) Season Premiere – Folks pitch products, British style.
  • More to Love (Fox, 9pm) Series Premiere – The bachelor for plus sized folks, because clearly there’s no place for them on regular dating shows.

Wednesday

  • Holidate (Soap, 10pm) Series Premiere – I think it’s kind of like swapping houses with blind dates attached, meeting someone in another city apparently sounds like a good idea.
  • The Nine (DirTV, 10pm) – If you’ve been waiting to see what happened with the, what was it, a bank robbery?

Thursday

  • The Real Housewives of Atlanta (Brav, 10pm) Season Premiere – The ladies are back and there’s a new gal this season.

Friday

  • X Games (ESPN/ESPN2, Thu – on, various times) – If it’s considered extreme you can probably find it one of these days.
  • Tennis (ESPN2, Thu-Sun, various times) – So this week I can watch Women’s from Stanford or Men’s from LA, so many sports so little time, thank goodness Tour de France is over.

Saturday

  • Face the Ace (NBC, 9pm) Series Premiere – Professional, and not, poker players try to, you know, win.
  • It’s Me or the Dog (AnPl, 9pm) Season Premiere – A bad dog, or maybe just too many pets, can be too much to handle.

Sunday

  • Ty’s Great British Adventure (ABC, 8pm) – Ty Pennington takes his makeover on the road, well probably a plane.
  • Defying Gravity (ABC, 9pm) Series Premiere – Ron Livingston’s latest stab at television takes him to space in the future.
  • Megan Wants a Millionaire (VH1, 9pm) Series Premiere – More Rock of Love spin off dating shows is really what we need, this time shallow Megan maybe got this as a settlement for her on screen fight with Sharon Osborne.
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next week 7/13

New and notable in the week ahead… procrastinator picks are underlined.

Monday

  • Tour de France (Vs, 5:30am and various) – Stage 9 starts out our week in Saint-Gaudens, who will be in yellow?
  • Anthony Bourdain: No Reservations (Trav, 10pm) Season Premiere – The chef heads to Chile.

Tuesday

  • MLB All-Star Game (Fox, 8pm) – The stars, and I believe they mean baseball stars, play.
  • Miami Social (Brav, 10pm) Series Premiere – Yet another reality show following folks.

Wednesday

  • Extreme Loggers (Disc, 9pm) Season Premiere – Ice bridges and subarctic forests.
  • Leverage (TNT, 9pm) Season Premiere – Will Nate get the team back together to continue their Robin Hood type cons?
  • Dark Blue (TNT, 10pm) Series Premiere – Dylan McDermott is back and this time he’s an undercover cop.
  • Verminators (Disc, 10pm) Season Premiere – Rodents and rats and bees, oh my, though I guess a rat is a rodent.
  • Michael & Michael Have Issues (Com, 10:30pm) Series Premiere – The Michaels, Ian Black and Showalter, sets them as characters who host a sketch comedy show.

Thursday

  • Joan of Arcadia (Syfy, 8am) – It’s not new but it was a fun series if you missed it the first time catch the marathon today starting with Joan meeting God.
  • Stoked (Cart, 8:30pm) Series Premiere – The animated cast of surfers work at a surf resort.

Friday

  • Catch It Keep It (Sci, 10pm) Series Premiere – Using science to win a game show.
  • Martin Lawrence Presents (Starz, 11pm) Season Premiere – It’s some stand-up.

Saturday

  • The Bill Engvall Show (TBS, 9pm) Season Premiere – Another season of another series with an average and immature hubby with a hotter than he wife.
  • Dirty Sexy Money (ABC, 10pm) – I remember really enjoying the cheese factor of this show, at least early on.

Sunday

  • Action Sports (NBC, 11am) – The boarders and bikers hit Costa Mesa for the Maloof Money Cup.
  • Labor Pains (ABCF, 8pm) – It’s just nice to hear Lindsey Lohan’s name in conjunction with something related to acting.
  • ESPYs (ESPN, 9pm) – Samuel L Jackson hosts the sporting awards.
  • AFI Life Achievement Award (TVL, 9pm) – The honoring of Michael Douglas.
  • Ace of Cakes (Food, 10pm) Season Premiere – Duff and the gang are back to baking, they look good but I wonder how they taste.
  • HGTV Design Star (HGTV, 10pm) Season Premiere – Design star wannabes hit LA.
  • Most Popular (WE, 10pm) Series Premiere – Graham Norton hosts this game show where being popular now equals money.
  • Pawn Star$ (Hist, 10pm) Series Premiere – What industry don’t we have a reality insight into?
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next week 7/6

New and notable in the week ahead… procrastinator picks are underlined.

Monday

  • Cycling (Vs, 5:30am and various) – The Tour de Lance continues, you can catch stage 3 and keep watching all week at almost all hours of the day with Phil, Paul, Bob and Craig taking us along for the ride. 
  • The Great Debate (VH1, 10pm) – A week long look at things like J.Lo vs Beyonce.

Tuesday

  • 10 Things I Hate About You (ABCFam, 8pm) Series Premiere – Based on the ’99 movie, the wannabe popular sister and the wannabe serious sister deal with school and boys and dear old dad.
  • The Great American Road Trip (NBC, 8pm) Series Premiere – Families in challenges across America.
  • Warehouse 13 (SciFi, 9pm) Series Premiere – The latest collection of weird brings a new male female partner team, this time Secret Service, to a warehouse…
  • That’s Impossible (Hist, 10pm) Series Premiere – Invisibility, yes or no?

Wednesday

  • Ghost Hunters International (SciFi, 9pm) Season Premiere – It’s like Ghost Hunters but it’s International.

Thursday

  • Big Brother (CBS, 8pm) Season Premiere – It’s back, season 11 of people trapped in a house.
  • LA Ink (TLC, 10pm) Season Premiere – Returning from a book tour to a busy shop…

Friday

  • Eureka (SciFi, 9pm) Season Premiere – Silly but fun, will the fired sheriff stay away from this isolated town of genius’s their inventions and their calamitous disasters.

Saturday

  • Eli Stone (ABC, 10pm) Series Finale – I’ve been tivo’ing the return of this series but have yet to tune back in, as I recall I enjoyed it.

Sunday

  • Drop Dead Diva (Life, 9pm) Series Premiere – A dead model gets dropped into a ‘plus-size’ lawyer’s body, and I’m sure she’ll grow as a person.
  • I Survived… (Bio, 9pm) Season Premiere – I believe these are reenactments.
  • Entourage (HBO, 10:30pm) Season Premiere – The boys are back, I think I watched season one through netflix and it was funny then, season six who knows.
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next week 6/29

New and notable in the week ahead… procrastinator picks are underlined.

Monday

  • Dance Your Ass Off (Oxy, 10pm) Series Premiere– I think this is exactly what it sounds like.
  • Wimbledon Update (NBC, Mon-Fri, 11:35pm) – Stick around late night for a fun look from Mary Carillo and John MacEnroe.

Tuesday

  • Stager Invasion (TLC, 8pm) Series Premiere – Updating a country themed home…
  • Tiny & Toya (BET, 10pm) Series Premiere – A sneak peek at their first episode, whoever they are and whatever that is.
  • Nova ScienceNow (PBS, 9pm) Season Premiere – Sciency things like artificial diamonds and anthrax.
  • Primetime (ABC, 10pm) Season Premiere – A look at caring for elderly parents.

Wednesday

  • Monsters Inside Me (AnPl, 9pm) Series Premiere – A look at organisms, inside people, I just don’t want to know.

Thursday

  • There’s really nothing new or notable on, so perhaps roll into the three day weekend with a movie, perhaps Transformers, hmm, or those Netflix that are covered with dust, or those 14 episodes of Lost, or maybe just more Wimbledon.

Friday

  • Margaret Cho (Show, 11pm) – Cho does what she does in this latest special.

Saturday

  • Beach Volleyball (NBC, Sat/Sun, 1:30pm) – Check out the Men’s final from Brooklyn NY followed by the Women’s final on Sunday.
  • Macy’s 4th of July Fireworks (NBC, 9pm) – Natalie Morales and Tiki Barber host with musical guests Jewel and Rob Thomas among others.
  • Boston Pops Fireworks (CBS, 10pm) – Craig Ferguson hosts Neil Diamond performs with the Boston Pops.

Sunday

  • Wimbledon (NBC, Mon-Sun, various times) – Wrap up the last week of tennis with breakfast on the weekend for Women’s and Men’s finals  if you feel like getting up at 6am, I do so love tivo.
  • Ruby (Style, 8pm) Season Premiere – Apparently there is a character names Ruby who is on a diet and goes to see Rascal Flatts.
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next week 6/22

New and notable in the week ahead… procrastinator picks are underlined.

Monday

  • Make It or Break It (ABCFam, 9pm) Series Premiere – Network keeps showing promos for the movie Stick It so I wouldn’t be the only one making the comparison, let’s hope it captures some of the wit.
  • History Detectives (PBS, 9pm) Season Premiere – What did Thomas Edison invent, a phone to talk to the dead?

Tuesday

  • Superstars (ABC, 8pm) Series Premiere – Celebs and athletes compete.
  • America’s Got Talent (NBC, 9pm and Wed) Season Premiere – Probably won’t see Susan Boyle or Jerry Springer who is being replaced by Nick Cannon as host.
  • The Best Thing I Ever Ate (Food, 9:30pm) Series Premiere – Chefs reminisce about food…
  • Better Off Ted (ABC, 9:30pm)  – Ted and Veronica and the gang are back to pick up the rest of the season in the weird work world.
  • The Cleaner (A&E, 10pm) Season Premiere – Whoopi’s guesting but will she be the one who needs recovery?
  • College Hill (BET, 10pm) Season Premiere
  • NYC Prep (Brav, 10pm) Series Premiere – Will a look at real life prep schools be as entertaining as Gossip Girl, or more so?
  • Primetime (ABC, 10pm) Season Premiere – The season kicks off with a look at teen pregnancy.

Wednesday

  • The Philanthropist (NBC, 10pm) Series Premiere – For some reason I’m not enthused about rich playboy as rebel for the people but I’ll check out Jesse L Martin and Neve Campbell who join lead James Purefoy.
  • The Real World (MTV, 10pm) Season Premiere – Really they’re doing this in Cancun?

Thursday

  • Samantha Who?/In the Motherhood (ABC, 8/8:30pm) – They’re back for their remaining episodes as Sam dates Duran Duran’s John Taylor and the moms do something.
  • Penn & Teller: Bullshit (Show, 10pm) Season Premiere– It says they’re looking at orgasms.

Friday

  • Virtuality (Fox, 8pm) – I think this is a pilot for a series that didn’t see the light of day as a spaceship’s virtual reality system goes awry.

Saturday

  • Action Sports (NBC, 11am) – When did the Dew tour become the Alli Dew tour, regardless this weekend it’s in Chicago for the BMX Open.
  • Ellen’s Bigger Longer and Wider Show (TBS, 9pm)  – Ellen does variety one more time and is joined by Kanye West and David Blaine among others.

Sunday

  • Tour de France Preview (Vs, 4pm) – Sprints, mountains, time trials… but hopefully no doping drama.
  • BET Awards (BET, 5pm) – Jamie Foxx hosts the celebrations or entertainers.
  • HGTV Showdown (HGTV, 10pm) Season Premiere – This week’s it’s a battle of the backyards.
  • Hung (HBO, 10pm) Series Premiere – High school teacher turned man whore?
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next week 6/15

New and notable in the week ahead… procrastinator picks are underlined.

Monday

  • DJ & the Fro (MTV, 5pm) Series Premiere – Are animated slackers watching viral videos more amusing than real life people doing the same?
  • Greek (ABCFam, 8pm) Season Finale – Cappie or Max? There’s really no question…
  • Run’s House (MTV, 10pm) Season Premiere – The family takes a Hawaiian vacation.

Tuesday

  • CMT Music Awards (CMT, 8pm) – Bill Engvall hosts this year’s awards show, tune in for Taylor Swift, and some other country artists.
  • Wedding Day (TNT, 8pm) Series Premiere – Real life weddings with no apparent twists.
  • The First 48 (A&E, 9pm) Season Premiere
  • HawthoRNe (TNT, 9pm) Series Premiere – Jada Pinkett Smith and Michael Vartan make this medical drama worth tuning into at least once.
  • The Lazy Environmentalist (Sund, 9pm) Series Premiere – They show us it’s easy being green.
  • Saving Grace (TNT, 10pm) Season Premiere – More answers this season or just more questions as Grace goes to the purple door.
  • The Singing Bee (CMT, 10:30pm) Season Premiere – Expectations may be a little higher as this follows the CMT Awards.

Wednesday

  • The Othersiders/Survive This (Cart, 8/8:30pm) Series Premiere – Paranormal investigations and survival skills.
  • Gordon Ramsay’s F Word (BBCA, 9pm) Season Premiere – Gordon Ramsay is back.
  • I Survived a Japanese Game Show (ABC, 9pm) Season Premiere – Really, this is back?
  • The Unusuals (ABC, 10pm) Series Finale – This quirky ensemble cop show deserved another season.

Thursday

  • NBA Basketball (ABC, 6pm) – Could it go to Game 7 with the Magic and the Lakers?

Friday

  • Jeffrey and Cole Casserole (Logo, 11pm) Series Premiere – Another sketch and look at viral videos, and this time with a gay old slant.

Saturday

  • Brainrush/Destroy Build Destroy (Cart, 8/8:30pm) Series Premieres – Trivia in rollercoaster conditions and then making something from the debris of what’s been destroyed.
  • Can You Duet (CMT, 8pm) Season Premiere – The open auditions begin.
  • Eli Stone (ABC, 10pm) – I don’t actually remember where we left off with Eli, his visions, and his law firm.

Sunday

  • Just for Laughs (ABC, 7pm) Season Premiere – More awkward setups for some chuckles.
  • Merlin (NBC, 8pm) Series Premiere – A look back when Merlin and the Prince were young and hot and magic was outlawed, Giles from Buffy is in this so I’ll give it a look.
  • Guys Choice (Spike, 10pm) – One thinks that guys make some sort of choice.
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next week 6/1

New and notable in the week ahead… procrastinator picks are underlined.

Monday

  • I’m a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here (NBC, 8pm) Season Premiere – Well the term celebrity is once again being loosely applied, with folks like Janice Dickinson, Sanjaya, and a lesser Baldwin, among others, will folks tune in to vote them off? 
  • Medium (NBC, 10pm) Season Finale – This is Medium’s last night on NBC but CBS has picked Allison up for another year of visions.
  • The Tonight Show (NBC, 11:35pm) – Conan takes the reins…

Tuesday

  • According to Jim (ABC, 8/8:30pm) Season Finale – I wasn’t sure this show was still on, though apparently this season is its last.
  • Earth 2100 (ABC, 9pm) – Bob Woodruff reports on where things could be going.
  • Inside the Obama White House (Tues/Wed, NBC, 9pm) – Brian Williams kicks it and shows us some dish.
  • Law & Order: SVU (NBC, 10pm) Season Finale – The negotiations continue with Benson and Stabler but regardless next year the show will go on.
  • Man vs. Wild (Disc, 10pm) – Will Ferrell joins for a real life adventure through the frosty wild, but reportedly does not drink his own urine.
  • Paris Hilton’s My New BFF (MTV, 10pm) Season Premiere – I guess last year’s winner isn’t her BFF anymore, maybe she is hanging with Nichole Ritchie.

Wednesday

  • Law & Order (NBC, 10pm) Season Finale – Are these stories still ripped from the headlines, if so watch out for charity folks.

Thursday

  • Jimmy Kimmel Live/NBA Countdown/Finals Game (ABC, 6pm) – We kick off the finals with some Kimmel and some basketball, Kimmel starts before in the East and after in the West.
  • Burn Notice (USA, 9pm) Season Premiere – Will Michael’s life improve now that the people who burned him are going to leave him alone, I doubt it, and catch up on the earlier shows marathon-style starting with the pilot Tues at 6am.
  • The Listener (NBC, 9/10pm) Series Premiere – If a paramedic can hear your thoughts would he be entertaining?
  • Royal Pains (USA, 10pm) Series Premiere – Brothers hit the Hamptons, one becomes a reluctant concierge Dr and the other is trying to make him less reluctant.
  • Tosh.0 (Com, 10pm) Series Premiere – Comedian Daniel Tosh riffs on crap you find on the web.

Friday

  • Privileged (CW, 8pm) – The show may not go on but you can watch season one again, or catch it for the first time.
  • Ghost Adventures (Trav, 9pm) Season Premiere – Not so much ghostbusters as wananabe ghost recorders.
  • Whale Wars (AnPl, 9pm) Season Premiere – Another season of folks in a boat trying to protect whales.

Saturday

  • Tennis (Fri, Sat, Sun, 7/6am) – Catch the French Open finals this weekend, following more weekday play, to see if Serena can take number 1 from Safina and if Roger can triumph over Nadal on his best surface.
  • Game Show Awards (GSN, 8pm) – Isn’t winning a game show award enough?

Sunday

  • Tony Awards (CBS, 8pm) – Neil Patrick Harris hosts this year’s best of Broadway.
  • Bridezillas/Amazing Wedding Cakes (WE, 9/10pm) Season Premieres – More real life wedding drama.
  • Gene Simmons Family Jewels (A&E, 9pm) Season Premiere – Can a girl get a simple sweet sixteen party on this reality drama.
  • Brooke Knows Best (VH1, 10/10:30pm) Season Premiere – This one is the daughter of Hulk Hogan.
  • Army Wives (Life, 10pm) Season Premiere – The ladies are back for another season of drama.
  • Kendra/Denise Richards (E!, 10/11pm) – More reality for the former playmate and the ‘actress’.
  • Z Rock/Ideal (IFC, 11/11:30pm) Season/Series Premiere – Clearly there need to be even more reality shows.
  • Next Food Network Star (Food, 9pm) Season Premiere – Who will be the next Martha Stewart, or at least the next whoever won last season.

* Times noted are PST.

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