The Big Bang Theory/How I Met Your Mother/Two and a Half Men (CBS, 8/8:30/9pm) – Back after a little strike lull! They’ll keep The New Adventures of Old Christine company.
Dancing With the Stars (ABC, 8pm; also Tues, 9pm) Season Premiere – A new gang cuts some rug, again not exactly A-list but some sports and interestingly the deaf Marlee Matlin.
The Bachelor (ABC, 9:30pm) Season Premiere – The single guy London style, who will get the rose? Of course who cares, they’ll break up soon anyhow.
Tuesday
It’s the Easter Beagle Charlie Brown (ABC, 8pm) – Looks like Easter must be coming, at least for the Peanuts gang.
The Riches (FX, 10pm) Season Premiere – This con family kept me on the edge of my seat as they pretended to be The Riches, it’s tough pretending to be a lawyer and his family whilst your con friends are out to get you.
Miss/Guided (ABC, 10:30; returns on Thurs 8/8:30pm) Series Premiere – The delightful Judy Greer returns to her alma mater as a guidance counselor for some old and new high school fun.
Wednesday
Well I’ll probably tune into acronym city ANTM, AI, and then L&O.
Thursday
Lost (ABC, 9pm) – Last for a couple of weeks before we get the new post strike eps going late April, I have been digging this season.
Lipstick Jungle (NBC, 10pm) Season Finale – And done. For now, and forever?
Friday/Saturday
Netflix, cineplex, book? – Though they are playing the next ep of Jezebel Friday, I’ll set the tivo just in case.
Sunday
The L Word (Show, 9pm) Season Finale -The fifth season wraps up as the ladies… uh I don’t know… I don’t get Showtime and I’ve never watched this show but since it’s about lesbians I assume it’s mostly ladies…
Canterbury’s Law (Fox, 8pm) Series Premiere – The makers of ‘Rescue Me’ bring Julianna Margulies playing a kick ass lawyer.
The Bachelor (ABC, 8pm) – A lovely ‘where are they now’ episode.
October Road (ABC, 9pm) Season Finale – Back to back episodes cap off the season.
Tuesday
Beauty and the Geek (CW, 8pm) Season Premiere – This year it’s the beauties vs the geeks.
According to Jim (ABC, 9pm) Season Finale – And the season closes out.
Wednesday
Top Chef (Bravo, 10pm) Season Premiere – This year they settle in the windy city.
South Park (Comedy, 10pm) Season Premiere – Did I seriously read this was the 12th season for this animated show?
Thursday
Celebrity Rehab (VH1, 10pm) – The gang gets back together in this reunion show, how will they be doing?
Reaper (CW, 9pm) – It’s a fresh ep, let’s see what Satan is asking of our little bounty hunter now, and whether he’s dating the spawn of Satan.
Friday
Return of Jezebel James (Fox, 8pm) – From the makers of Gillmore Girls and starring great gals Parker Posey and Lauren Ambrose as sisters, I’ll tune in even if it’s not supposed to be great.
Saturday
Wisegal (Lifetime, 9pm) – Who could pass up Alyssa Milano in a made for tv mafioso movie?
Sunday
John Adams (HBO, 8pm) – The first in the seven part mini-series.
Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles (Fox, 8-10pm) Season Finale – I have to say I am still not in love with Sarah or John but still find this show pretty interesting with the past, present, and future and what the right thing to do is.
Tuesday
New Amsterdam (Fox, 8pm) Series Debut – So some immortal guy is looking for his true love while fighting crime of course.
Carpoolers (ABC, 9:30) Season Finale – This is the show about four guys who… carpool, with Jerry O’Connell, and I find it almost funny.
The Real Housewives of New York City (Bravo, 11pm) Series Premiere – For those of you who just couldn’t get enough of the Real Housewives of Orange County.
Wednesday
Project Runway (Bravo, 10pm) Season Finale – Who will have the finest collection? Ok, I’m still like four episodes behind.
Thursday
Celebrity Rehab With Dr Drew (VH1, 10pm) Season Finale – Addiction isn’t always pretty, but I’m addicted to this show, which actually surprised me with how much I thought this show was a bad idea but these ‘celebrities’ were shown as real people with real issues.
Friday
Stargate Atlantis (SciFi, 10pm) Season Finale – I think I’ve seen at least some sort of Stargate… I don’t know if this is underwater?
Saturday
Beach Volleyball (Kron, 9pm) – AVP Crocs Hot Winter Nights tour and I do love me some good beach volleyball.
Sunday
The Wire (HBO, 9pm) Series Finale – Well this is it for the series and I know some obsessive folks who are bummed about that, and some folks who still aren’t caught up on the dvds so they won’t really appreciate the loss for a while.
Breaking Bad (AMC, 10pm) Season Finale – Well I am behind on these as well but wanna stick through and see what other ridiculous things these drug guys are into.
My Fair Brady (VH1, 10:30pm) Season Finale – I’m just noting this because I know someone who watches this show.
Raisin in the Sun (ABC, 8pm) – Actual Broadway stars in this teleplay version produced by Puff/PDiddy/Sean Combs himself.
The Gates (HBO, 10pm) – Documentary showing the 25 year/20 million art project of steel flagged arches throughout central park.
Tuesday
Quarterlife (NBC, 10pm/second ep sunday 9pm) Series Premiere – This is the show about annoying 25 year olds that was rejected as a pilot, produced for the web, then put back on tv, as I recall the decision was made around strike time.
Back to You (Fox, 9:30pm/next ep wed 9:30) – They’re back on as the coanchors try to deal with each other and their kid.
Wednesday
Men in Trees (ABC, 10pm) – Back from hiatus as Anne Heche does stuff in Alaska.
Project Runway (Bravo, 10pm) Season Finale Part 1 – Ok I am about three behind on this, time to catch up before the winner is spilled.
Thursday
Celebrity Rehab (VH1, 10pm) Season Finale – So I have gotten totally hooked on these folks, and honestly I have my doubts but it would be nice if some sobriety stuck. — hmm looks like there is one more after this.
Friday
Your Mama Don’t Dance (Life, 9pm) Series Premiere – Yes it’s another dance show as DWTS vet Ian Ziering hosts actual dancers and their parents in competition.
Saturday
George Carlin: It’s Bad for Ya (HBO, 10pm) – Looks like it’s Carlin’s 13th comedy special making the funny.
Sunday
Oprah’s Big Give (ABC, 9pm) Series Premiere – Contestants compete to be the biggest givers by giving of course.
Unhitched (Fox, 9:30pm) Series Premiere – Four newly single ‘losers’ make their way together.
Dirt (Fx, 10pm) Season Premiere – Courtney Cox as gossip mag queen.
Here Come the Newlyweds (ABC, 10pm) Series Premiere – Seven couples compete or something.
Dance War: Bruno vs. Carrie Ann (ABC, 8pm) Season Finale – So the teams compete, and I read they are announcing the next round of Dancing with the Stars competitors.
Prison Break (Fox, 8pm) – Last due to strike as the guys try to break out or something.
My Dad is Better Than Your Dad (NBC, 9pm) SeriesPremiere – Some sort of family stunt competition, headed up by Dad.
Pussycat Dolls Presents: Girlicious (CW, 9pm) Series Premiere – Since they’ve got enough Pussycat dolls they’re forming a whole new girl group.
Tuesday
Boston Legal (ABCX, 10pm) – Last due to strike as the firm takes a case or something.
Nip/Tuck (Fx, 10pm) Season Finale – The boys nip and tuck.
Wednesday
America’s Next Top Model (CW, 8pm) Season Premiere – Thirty gals get narrowed down to the final entries to the house… I have to say this isn’t as fun as once they narrow down but gets me back in the ANTM groove!
Cashmere Mafia (ABC, 10pm) – Last due to strike as the gals deal with drama in nice clothes.
Thursday
American Idol (Fox, 8pm) – So two nights aren’t enough as they kick off two of the guys and two of the gals.
Supernatural (CW, 9pm) – Last ep due to strike as the boys fight the supernatural I presume.
Friday
The Price is Right (CBS, 8pm) – Drew and the gang hit primetime.
Amne$ia (NBC, 9pm) Series Premiere – Dennis Miller hosts this latest game show where contestants are quizzed about things from their actual life.
Saturday
Independent Spirit Awards (IFC, 5pm) – Rainn Wilson hosts as the indies are honored.
Joe Louis: America’s Hero…Betrayed (HBO, 8pm) – A documentary on cross over athlete Joe Lewis covering the time he defeated the Nazis, ok fought a German.
Sunday
The Barbara Walters Special (ABC, 7est before/8:30pst pm following the awards) – Babs interviews Miley Cyrus, Ellen Page, Harrison Ford, and Vanessa Williams, aren’t these interviews supposed to be more relevant, I mean that Miley seems hot with the kids but otherwise…
80th Annual Academy Awards (ABC, 5pst/8est pm) – Preshow first for a half hour, the real deal follows, I would be pretty happy if I could win my oscar pool and see a truly hideous dress, but the odds are for hideous dress alone.
Flavor of Love (VH1, 9pm) Season Premiere – Apparently Flavor didn’t find true love last season…
Girlfriends (CW, 9/9:30pm) – Last due to the strike as the gang keeps doing how they do.
Tuesday
Big Brother (CBS, 9pm) Season Premiere – So in the 9th season the gang gets matched up as couples to compete as teams.
Jericho (CBS, 10pm) Season Premiere – I was never in love with this show but this post nuclear drama has got a nice fan following.
Wednesday
ANTM (CW, 8pm) – Part two of the retrospective clips show.
Thursday
NAACP Image Awards (Fox, 8pm) – Stevie Wonder and Aretha Franklin receive special honors.
Friday
Monk (USA, 9pm) Season Finale – So this is actually only part 1, part 2 will air next week as Monk tries to escape his arrest for murder.
Las Vegas (NBC, 9pm) – Last due to the strike as the gang in the surveillance room gets taken hostage.
Celine Dion (CBS, 9pm) – Whatever.
Psych (USA, 10pm) Season Finale – This is the one where the guy pretends to be psychic?
Saturday
Sports Illustrated Swimsuit 2008 (TNT, 11pm) – Behind the lens look at this shoot, for those who like that sort of thing.
Sunday
Knight Rider (NBC, 9pm) – Oh yeah you read that right… Knight Rider is back, this tv movie was sort of designed as a back door pilot as we see a new KITT, a new driver, and you might see a touch of Hoff in a guest role.
Cold Case (CBS, 9pm) – Last due to strike as the team investigates an abusive father, but is he the culprit?
Family Guy (Fox, 9pm) Season Premiere – Apparently there’s some beef between the Family and James Woods who guests.
Brothers and Sisters (ABC, 10pm) – Last due to strike as the family makes some ‘compromises.’
Dexter (CBS, 10pm) Network Debut – I’ll probably get this serial killer/murder solver show on dvd before watching the edited version.
Welcome to the Captain (CBS, 8:30) Series Premiere – Flailing filmmaker moves into an apartment building that is eclectic to say the least, starring Jeffrey Tambor among others.
The New Adventures of Old Christine (CBS, 9:30pm) Season Premiere – Christine deals with her ex, his new girlfriend Christine, her brother/manny, her kind of geeky son, the mean moms at the private school she can barely afford, and of course the funny Wanda Sykes as gal pal and now curves-like business co-owner.
The Game (CW, 9:30) – The last episode due to the strike as I’m sure some drama and comedy will ensue with the gals of football.
Tuesday
House (Fox, 9pm) – Enjoy the last ep due to strike, as House deals with the always good, religious zealot with unknown ailment.
Super Tuesday Coverage (check your local listings) – Coverage on the elections, it’ll be super!
Wednesday
ANTM: Exposed (CW, 8pm) – I almost didn’t list this because I hate the clips shows, but apparently they’ve got highlights if you just can’t wait for the new season.
CSI: NY (CBS, 10pm) – Last ep due to the strike as ickily a victim is found drowned in a self cleaning toilet.
Thursday
Survivor (CBS, 8pm) Season Premiere – So this time they’re hitting Micronesia and it’s fans vs. favorites, I wonder how much money Jeff Probst makes for these.
Lipstick Jungle (NBC, 10pm) Series Premiere – This is the other one (if you like or wanted to like Cashmere Mafia) where it’s successful gal pals, only this one has three friends and one of them is Brooke Shields.
Friday
Davis Cup (OLN, Fri/Sat/Sun, 9am/pst, check your local listings) – Last year’s USA tennis champs head to Austria to start the new season.
Flash Gordon (Scifi, 8pm) Season Finale – I’ve never seen this show but have a nostalgic remembrance of the cheesy old movie version.
Friday Night Lights (NBC, 9pm) Last ep due to the strike as the players and those around them do what they do.
Saturday
Bernard and Doris (HBO, 8pm) – Ralph Fiennes and Susan Sarandon add some acting chops to the original HBO film’s fictionalized story of Doris Duke’s (who?) final years.
Sunday
Grammy Awards (CBS, 8pm) – They come, they model their outfits, they sing, they win… or lose as the case may be.
British Academy Film Awards (BBC, 8pm) – Apparently the stars are heading to this one if you want to catch them in case we don’t settle domestically.
100 Most Outrageous Moments of All Time (NBC, 9pm) – Not sure if this is a Britney biography or what.
State of the Union (6/9pm est/pst, Check Your Local Listings) – We don’t have to listen to him for much longer.
In Treatment (HBO, 9:30pm) Series Premiere – Gabriel Byrne is a therapist with of course a ton of issues of his own in this 5 night a week show, man, 5 nights a week?
Gossip Girl (CW, 8pm) – A special presentation of the pilot with additional behind the scenes and interview footage.
Making the Band (MTV, 10pm) Season Premiere – Hmm, so I read that this is the 11th season, then I read that this was Making the Band 4, maybe they stopped making new bands? I remember watching the first season on network tv with the making of OTown but haven’t watched since.
Tuesday
Baghdad Hospital: Inside the Red Zone (HBO, 8:30pm) – A close look at life in Baghdad by an Iraqi doctor who has since fled the country.
House (Fox, 9pm) – It’s new, they try to diagnose someone… should still be two more after this.
Wednesday
Lost (ABC, 9pm) – Last season’s finale with extra facts and tidbits to get you caught up.
Crowned: The Mother of All Pageants (CW, 8pm) Season Finale – I don’t know what they win, but one team will win.
American Ballroom Challenge (PBS, 8pm) – And they dance….
Thursday
Lost (ABC, 8/9pm) Season Premiere – It’s baaack, and they really want you to know what’s going on so the recap espisode at 8 should tell us all we need to know to get sucked in yet again… they better settle this strike.
Eli Stone (ABC, 10pm) Series Premiere – Is this lawyer a prophet, a sick man, or a nut job? No matter what his life is going to change.
Friday
1 vs. 100, Friday Night Lights, Las Vegas (NBC, 8/9/10) – They’re new…
Dinner for Five (IFC, 10:30) – Jon Favreau welcomes guests Vince Vaughn, Peter Billingsley, Justin Long and Keir O’Donnell.
Saturday
Trading Spaces (TLC, 9pm) – This episode is the first in its regular timeslot, we had the first ep of the season last week, and we were all excited to have Paige back holding the reigns again.
Sunday
Suberbowl XLII (Fox, 3pm/pst ) – This might be the only occasion that we use roman numerals.
House (Fox, 7:15?) – In the coveted after superbowl spot Mira Sorvino gets some remote diagnosis.
Life is Wild (CW, 8pm) Season Finale – I guess you could find out how the wild is treating this family.
Wildfire (ABC Fam, 9pm) Season Premiere – It’s actually quite surprising how many original series there are out there on other cable channels, this is season 4 of this delinquent-but-good-with-horses gal gets another chance with a ranch family.
Democratic Presidential Debate: South Carolina (CNN, 5pm pst) – What have they got to say? Maybe nothing new, but maybe worth a look.
Tuesday
Law & Order: SVU (NBC, 10pm) Last episode due to strike – An embryo caper makes Olivia question her own timeline, too bad they couldn’t just time this to when Mariska was pregnant.
Millionaire Matchmaker (Bravo, 11pm normally at 10pm) Series Premiere – Follow a matchmaking service with, yes you guessed it, millionaire clientele.
Wednesday
Criminal Minds (CBS, 9pm) Last ep due to strike – I tend to only watch this show in reruns, which is I guess next week, but I’m sure the BAU gang will find a serial killer.
Moment of Truth (Fox, 9pm) Series Premiere – This is the one where they hook the contestants up to a lie detector and ask humiliating questions for money, what will they think of next?
Thursday
Chuck (NBC, 8 & 10pm) Last eps due to strike – They’re kicking us out with a little double shot, where Chuck will get into some shenanigans with his friends, coworkers and spy guys.
Ugly Betty & Big Shots (ABC, 8 & 10pm) Last eps due to strike – I’ll be watching Chuck of course.
Winter X Games 12 (24-27th, ESPN, ESPN2, ABC, Check your local listings) – Skis, snowmobiles, and snowboarders get gnarly in Colorado and it should include another round of Shaun White.
Friday
Garth Brooks: Live in LA! (CBS, 9pm) – It’ll be Garth, he’ll be singing, in LA, will it be live?
Saturday
Super Bowl’s Greatest Commercials (CBS, 8pm) – This must mean the super bowl is coming up.
US Figure Skating Women’s Championships (NBC, 8pm) – Isn’t the winter Olympics coming up, no I guess that’s next winter.
Torchwood (BBC, 9pm) Season Premiere – They describe this as ‘part X-Files part Angel… where excitement comes before morality,’ hmm…
Sunday
US Figure Skating Men’s Championships (NBC, 7pm) – Well I mentioned the women’s…
Screen Actors Guild Awards (TNT, 8pm) – This one could be picket free and actually attended.
Shark (CBS, 8pm) Last ep due to strike – Always good to get into Sebastian’s dark past when he’s a target for murder.
The Russell Girl (CBS, 9pm) – Probably a typical cheesy Hallmark movie but I developed a liking for Amber Tamblyn since Joan of Arcadia.
Terminator (Fox, 9pm) – We’re settling into the regular timeslot and since I probably won’t have watched Sunday’s pilot I’ll plan to tivo this too whether it’s watchable or not, oh who am I kidding with the strike my bar is pretty low.
Tuesday
American Idol (Fox, 8pm) Season Premiere – Starting it’s Tuesday and Wednesday runs at the early auditions, is my bar this low? I actually watched this for the first few seasons and then new people couldn’t make this show fresh enough for me.
Wednesday
Reno 911! (Comedy, 10:30) Season Premiere – I don’t get this channel and I’ve never seen this show, but some of these updates are going to start getting a little more arbitrary, so here’s Season 5.
Thursday
Celebrity Rehab with Dr Drew (VH1, 10pm) – The first of this started last week, and they’re rerunning it maybe every day if you missed it, I am a little bit morally opposed to this show and have no idea whether it’s entertaining or not but some ‘celebrities’ might get some help.
Friday
Moonlight (CBS, 9pm) – Maybe I’ll give this show another shot, though I found it a bad version of Angel the first time around.
Saturday
Husband for Hire (Oxygen, 9pm) – What have Erik Estrada and Tempest Bledsoe been up to, apparently this made for tv movie.
Sunday
Breaking Bad (AMC, 10pm) Series Premeire – Bryan Cranston is a high school chemistry teacher who makes some questionable choices once he’s diagnosed with cancer.