tv

new and noteworthy tv: 5/16-5/22

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The season is wrapping up enough that I might be able to catch up on some movies…

Monday

  • Off Limits (Trav, 9pm) Series Premiere – A look at another side of Los Angeles.
  • The Real Housewives of New Jersey (Brav, 9pm) Season Premiere – More of the women who are potentially wives with houses.
  • The Best Thing I Ever Ate (Food, 10:30pm) Season Premiere – Favorite food pairings.

Tuesday

  • Tosh.0 (Com, 10pm) Season Premiere – Daniel Tosh returns to his internet shenanigans.

Wednesday

  • ANTM (CW, 9pm) Season Finale – Who will be America’s Next… woman who gets some prizes?

Thursday

  • The Mentalist (CBS, 9pm) Season Finale – The two hour finale gets to the bottom of the Red John case, ok at least who the red John mole is.

Friday

  • VH1 Storytellers (VH1, 11pm) – How sad is it that I am remotely interested in Cee Lo Green now that he’s a coach on a reality show?

Saturday

  • Saturday Night Live (NBC, 11:30pm) Season Finale – With Justin Timberlake hosting we’re sure to get a new music video.

Sunday

  • Jesse Stone: Innocents Lost (CBS, 9pm) – The next in the series of Parker books come to TV, Tom Selleck is so good at being a bummer of a dude, while crime solving and all that.

The procrastinator lists items that may not be on your regular season pass, though notation does not imply recommendation other than those underlined. Times noted are typically PST.

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new and noteworthy tv: 5/9-5/15

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Another week, another batch of new and returning shows…

Monday

  • Diners, Drive-ins, & Dives (Food, 9pm) Season Premiere – Guy Fieri visits more spots.
  • Stargate Universe (Syfy, 9pm) Series Finale – I think there may be a gate still running somewhere.
  • Quints by Surprise (TLC, 10pm) Season Premiere – Can one parent deal with all five kids on their own?
  • Vanished with Beth Holloway (Life, 10pm) Series Premiere – Beth had a daughter disappear so she’s searching and will search with others for their loved ones.

Tuesday

  • Swamp Brothers (Disc, 10pm) Series Premiere – Follow the brothers as they run their reptile sanctuary and exotic reptile dealership.

Wednesday

  • Nothing new is happening but I’m still triple booked on Idol, Modern Family, and ANTM.

Thursday

  • Naked Science (NGC, 8pm) Season Premiere – Following a single oxygen molecule.
  • Swords (Disc, 10pm) Season Premiere – Reality following a boat on the hunt for swordfish, not actual swords.

Friday

  • Smallville (CW, 8pm) Series Finale – Clark becomes superman, or however they’re wrapping this up.

Saturday

  • Running Wilde (FX, 11pm) – They’re apparently running the rest of these.

Sunday

  • Jerseylicious (Style, 8pm) Season Premiere – Some people do some stuff.

The procrastinator lists items that may not be on your regular season pass, though notation does not imply recommendation other than those underlined. Times noted are typically PST.

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new and noteworthy tv: 5/2-5/8

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TiVo is still only at 15% but I’ve got enough ongoing shows to keep me entertained…

Monday

  • Taboo (NGC, 9pm) Season Premiere – Obsessed with fantasy lives is weird, ok weird is relative but a grown man dressing as a baby?
  • James May’s Road Trip (BBCA, 10:20pm) Season Premiere – California Wineries make a great road trip.

Tuesday

  • Rescue Renovation (DIY, 8:30pm) Season Premiere – Those silly load bearing walls.
  • Chopped (Food, 10pm) Season Premiere – It’s a cooking show.
  • How the States Got Their Shapes (Hist, 10pm) Series Premiere – I guess if you are already on this channel and can’t find your remote…

Wednesday

  • Spouse vs House (TLC, 10pm) Series Premiere – Would you take a $25k renovation if your dude got to make all the decisions?
  • The Electric Barbarellas (MTV, 11pm) Series Premiere – This time we’re following an all girl group.

Thursday

  • DIY Dominator (DIY, 8pm) Season Premiere – Who can build the best fireplace?
  • Known Universe (NGC, 9pm) Season Premiere – Surviving outer space.
  • Pawn Queens (TLC, 10pm) Series Premiere – So does this make four pawn shows, or five?

Friday

  • Flashpoint (CBS, 8pm) Season Premiere – It’s sad when this decent procedural Canadian import actually looks like the best thing coming up.

Saturday

  • Sarah’s Summer House (HGTV, 8pm) Series Premiere – Why does this bitch have more than one house that she gets to decorate?
  • My Cat from Hell (AnPl, 9pm) Series Premiere – I think this is like that me or the dog show, but I wasn’t under the impression cats could be trained.
  • The Graham Norton Show (BBCA, 10pm) Season Premiere – He does more talk show type stuff.

Sunday

  • Wild Animal Repo (Disc, 8pm) Series Premiere – I think these animals are more repossessed due to bad care than unpaid payments.
  • Best in Smoke (Food, 10pm) Series Premiere – Who is the best barbecuer (that spelling can’t be right).
  • Why Not? With Shania Twain (OWN, 11pm) Series Premiere – I think this is a feel good follow this lady kind of show.

The procrastinator lists items that may not be on your regular season pass, though notation does not imply recommendation other than those underlined. Times noted are typically PST.

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new and noteworthy tv: 4/25-5/1

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Looks like we’re gearing up for the royal wedding, and if you’re particularly interested there are many a special on cable to keep you informed…

Monday

  • American Chopper (Disc, 9pm) Season Premiere – Senior and junior return.

Tuesday

  • The Voice (NBC, 9pm and Wed) Series Premiere – Kicking off the first of two nights of blind auditions, not sure what happens after the gimmick of just listening is over, I’ll probably check out one.
  • Repo Games (Spike, 8pm) Series Premiere – Repossession or answering trivia?

Wednesday

  • Inside the Royal Wedding (NBC, 8pm) – Matt Lauer and Meredith Viera go there.
  • South Park (Com, 10pm) Season Premiere – More cartoon goodness.

Thursday

  • 20/20 (ABC, 8pm) – The Royal Wedding.
  • The Office/Parks & Recreation (NBC, 9/9:52pm) – Michael Scott’s departure takes more than a half hour but less than an hour, so make sure your dvrs are set.
  • Break it Down (NGC, 10pm) Season Premiere – Taking apart Yankee stadium.
  • Son of a Gun (MTV, 11pm) Series Premiere – More reality, this time following a young rapper.

Friday

  • The Royal Wedding (CBS, 8pm) – The wedding coverage continues.
  • 20/20 (ABC, 9pm) – Apparently it is A Modern Fairy Tale.
  • Say Yes to the Dress (TLC, 10pm) Season Premiere – Will the wedding dress fit?

Saturday

  • Fight Camp 360 (CBS, 8pm) – Pacquiao vs. Mosley.

Sunday

  • L&O: Criminal Intent/In Plain Sight (USA, 9/10pm) Season Premieres – I have to admit I will miss Jeff Goldblum, never a fan of D’Onofrio in this role, I’ll still tune in for the evening to see his return and the return of Mary and more importantly Marshall Marshall.

The procrastinator lists items that may not be on your regular season pass, though notation does not imply recommendation other than those underlined. Times noted are typically PST.

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new and noteworthy tv: 4/18-4/24

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Is it summer yet?

Monday

  • Cougar Town (ABC, 9:30pm) – This has been off for a few so maybe they’re making up for that with a Mon/Wed double dose.
  • Love Games (Oxy, 10pm) Season Premiere – A couple of bad girls try to find good guys.

Tuesday

  • 16 & Pregnant (MTV, 10pm) Season Premiere – More pregnant teens.
  • Explorer (NGC, 10pm) Season Premiere – Forensic explorers look at bones and stuff.
  • Dresscue Me (PlGr, 10:30pm) Series Premiere – It’s on Planet Green so this fashion show is all about recycling vintage-style.

Wednesday

  • ANTM (CW, 9pm) – Kicking off a new time with the clips episode, I’m about four episodes behind and thinking about packing it in for the season.

Thursday

  • Call Me Fitz (Dir, 9pm) Series Premiere – Jason Priestly returns in front of the camera to play a car salesman with some craziness on the side.
  • 24 Hour Restaurant Battle (Food, 10pm) Season Premiere – Two former couples kick this off with their differing food stuffs.

Friday

  • Girls Night Out (CBS, 9pm) – Superstar women of country perform.
  • Dual Survival (Disc, 9pm) Season Premiere – Survivor shows just make me think about all the ways I could die.
  • Ice Pilots (NGC, 10pm) Series Premiere – Another show that makes me think about the ways I could die.

Saturday

  • Doctor Who (BBCA, 9pm) Season Premiere – Doctor time traveler returns…

Sunday

  • Treme (HBO, 10pm) Season Premiere – Things might not be recovered from Hurricane Katrina quite yet.
  • Have Cake Will Travel (Food, 10pm) Series Premiere – Cake and travel!

The procrastinator lists items that may not be on your regular season pass, though notation does not imply recommendation other than those underlined. Times noted are typically PST.

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new and noteworthy tv: 4/11-4/17

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Monday

  • L&O: LA (NBC, 9pm) Season Premiere – I don’t know why they decided Skeet was the problem, but they’re trying to rework this one, I’m always mildly interested in this franchise.
  • Paranormal State (A&E, 10pm) Season Premiere – More hauntings.

Tuesday

  • Jamie Oliver’s Food Revolution (ABC, 8pm) Season Premiere – Trying to do good things with food while traversing the red tape of the school systems, this is one of the feel good reality shows that I somehow enjoyed.
  • Braxton Family Values/Sinbad (WE, 9/10pm) Series Premiere – More reality following more ‘celebrities.’
  • Deadliest Catch (Disc, 9pm) Season Premiere – King crab season begins and the business must go on after the loss of the captain.
  • Toya (BET, 10pm) Series Premiere – I’m not even sure if this reality star is supposed to be a ‘celebrity.’
  • Sports Show with Norm Macdonald (Com, 10:30pm) Series Premiere – I believe Norm talks sports

Wednesday

  • Happy Endings (ABC, 9:30/10pm) Series Premiere – Another half hour comedy about couple/friends, this one doesn’t look particularly funnier than the rest of the rest but worth a shot.

Thursday

  • The Paul Reiser Show (NBC, 8:30pm) Series Premiere – This is one of those real life person plays a version of themselves in a comedy series, not sure the Mad About You jokes will be all that funny but we’ll see what he’s got.

Friday

  • Friday Night Lights (NBC, 8pm) Season Premiere – I’m still on season 2…
  • Hooked (NGC, 9pm) Series Premiere – A fishing show.
  • Killer Outbreaks (AnPl, 9pm) Series Premiere – A look at doctors and scientists looking at pathogens.
  • The Whitest Kids u’Know (IFC, 10:30pm) Season Premiere – More sketch comedy.

Saturday

  • Parking Wars (A&E, 10pm) Season Premiere – People really aren’t happy about tickets, towing and getting the boot.

Sunday

  • Mob Wives/Audrina/Saddle Ranch (VH1, 8/9/9:30pm) Series Premieres – Connected, reality professionals, and more wannabes.
  • Burn Notice (USA, 9pm) – A prequel to the series gives a look at the fall of Sam Axe, I like Sam on this series so hope it’s entertaining.
  • Game of Thrones (HBO, 9pm) Series Premiere – Adaptation of some fantasy books the series is supposed to be good, though I don’t get HBO.
  • Inspector America (Hist, 10pm) Series Premiere – Infrastructure safety inspector inspects across America.
  • TV Land Awards (TVL, 10:30pm) – Casts reuniting include Family Ties, Cosby Show, and The Facts of Life.
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new and noteworthy tv: 4/4-4/10

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I’ve been letting my shows get a little backed up, though I have been making time for reruns of Veronica Mars and Buffy the Vampire Slayer on Netflix…

Monday

  • NCAA Men’s Championship (CBS, 9pm) – I think this might be the end.
  • Kidnapped by the Kids (OWN, 9pm) Series Premiere – Workaholics spend some quality time with their kids.
  • Relapse (A&E, 9pm) Series Premiere – Like Addiction except they’re in relapse after detoxing.
  • Rob Dyrdek’s Fantasy Factory (MTV, 10:30pm) Season Premiere – The Beiber stops by.
  • WWE Tough Enough (USA, 11:05pm) Season Premiere – Steve Austin hosts a new crop of competitors.

Tuesday

  • Addicted to Food (OWN, 10pm) Series Premiere – Following folks trying to overcome food addiction for 42 days in a treatment facility.
  • Auction Hunters (Spike, 10pm) Season Premiere – More auctiony items.
  • Pregnant in Heels (Brav, 10pm) Series Premiere – So maternity concierge is a title, and you get to see what they do.

Wednesday

  • Extreme Couponing (TLC, 9pm) Series Premiere – I love a good coupon, I just don’t want to spend more time trying to save money than it would take me to actually earn it at a job.
  • Mythbusters (Disc, 9pm) Season Premiere – Firearms, misdirection… what myths will they debunk or prove?
  • Breaking In (Fox, 9:30pm) Series Premiere – I always like high-tech security premise let’s see if Christian Slater and the kid from Reaper entertain.
  • Glamour Belles (Life, 10pm) Series Premiere – A look at a pageant dress shop, I didn’t realize there was such a thing, clearly I’m not watching the right reality.
  • Tori & Dean (Oxy, 10pm) Series Premiere – I don’t know that it really counts as a new series when reality stars do yet another slant on their lives.
  • Workaholics (Com, 10:30pm) Series Premiere – Apparently the title is supposed to be funny because it’s about pot head slackers.
  • Top Chef Masters (Brav, 11pm) Season Premiere – Curtis Stone is a new host and Ruth Reichl is a new judge.

Thursday

  • Police Women/Unleashed (TLC, 9/10pm) Season/Series Premiere – Police women and then a K-9 unit.
  • Bear Whisperer (AnPl, 10pm) Season Premiere – A wild life specialist and of course bears.
  • Mounted in Alaska (Hist, 10pm) Series Premiere – Taxidermy anyone?
  • America’s Best Dance Crew (MTV, 10pm) Season Premiere – New crews compete.
  • The Real Housewives of NYC (Brav, 10pm) Season Premiere – I guess there’s a new one who is more normal, relatively speaking I assume.
  • Secret Diary of a Call Girl/Gigolos (Show, 10:30/11) Season/Series Premieres – The return of the series about a call girl and then real life paid male escorts.

Friday

  • The Singing Bee/CMT’s Next Superstar (CMT, 8/9pm) Season/Series Premieres – Competing with karaoke and then just country music.
  • Tiger Man of Africa (NGC, 10pm) Series Premiere – A look at a tiger sanctuary.

Saturday

  • It’s Me or the Dog (AnPl, 8pm) Season Premiere – I wonder if the answer to that question is the dog.

Sunday

  • Human Planet (Disc, 8pm) Series Premiere – How people live in various regions.
  • Upstairs Downstairs (PBS, 9pm) Miniseries Premiere – A revamp of turn of the century London masters and servants.
  • The Judds (OWN, 9pm) Series Premiere – Naomi and Wynonna do some stuff and you can watch them.
  • Shark Men (NGC, 9pm) Series Premiere – Men who look for or look at sharks.
  • Khloe & Lamar/The Dance Scene (E!, 10/10:30pm) Series Premieres – The latest version of Kardashian reality and then dancers train with a choreographer for fancy dance jobs.
  • River Monsters (AnPl, 10pm) Season Premiere – What river creature will they find in Papua New Guinea?

The procrastinator lists items that may not be on your regular season pass, though notation does not imply recommendation other than those underlined. Times noted are typically PST.

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new and noteworthy tv: 3/28-4/3

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And I think this might be the final week of the final four…

Monday

  • All Together Now (NBC, 8pm) – A celebration of service with presidents and whatnot.
  • The Secret Life of the American Teenager/Make It or Break It (ABCFam, 8/9pm) Season Premieres – Not sure how secret it is and whether they’ve made it or broken it yet.
  • Nurse Jackie/United States of Tara (Show, 10/10:30pm) Season Premieres – As I’m Showtime free I’ll be tempted to check these both on dvr at some point.

Tuesday

  • Body of Proof (ABC, 10pm) Series Premiere – Brilliant neurosurgeon forced to turn medical examiner, could be case of the week which always depends on personality and Dana Delany could theoretically make it worthwhile.
  • All on the Line (Sund, 10pm) Series Premiere – Can failing fashion lines be saved?
  • What the Sell (TLC, 10pm) Series Premiere – Another take on the pawn shop personalities and stuff.

Wednesday

  • The Ultimate Fighter/Coal (Spike, 9/10pm) Season/Series Premiere – More fighting and then a look at coal miners.
  • South Beach Classics (Disc, 10pm) Series Premiere – Car classics that is.
  • Tyler Perry’s House of Payne (TBS, 10pm) Season Premiere – Tyler continues his reign on entertainment.

Thursday

  • Mobbed (Fox, 9pm) – This take on a new series showcases flash mobs, groups of folks breaking out into song/dance.
  • Swamp People (Hist, 9pm) Season Premiere – No it’s not a monster movie, unless you count the gators that the folks live among.
  • True Crime with Aphrodite Jones (ID, 10pm) Season Premiere – The season starts with another look at JonBenet Ramsey.

Friday

  • Chaos (CBS, 8pm) Series Premiere – Rogue funny CIA? I’m tempted by this but it admittedly looks dumb.
  • Say Yes to the Dress: Randy Knows Best (TLC, 9:30pm) Series Premiere – I believe there’s a Yes to the Dress out there so I guess this is Randy’s slant.
  • Camelot (Starz, 10pm) Series Premiere – Same story different take, ok maybe not so different.
  • The Haunted (AnPl, 10pm) Season Premiere – Things with ghosts I suppose.

Saturday

  • Sony Ericsson Open (CBS, 9:30am) – The series starts its wraps up today with women’s finals with the men’s finals Sunday.
  • How Do I Look? (Style, 8pm) Season Premiere – I’m going to say starts looking bad and gets better…
  • Curb Appeal (HGTV, 8:30pm) Season Premiere – Spruce up a house.
  • My Ghost Story (Bio, 10pm) Season Premiere – More hauntings of the personal nature?

Sunday

  • Wild Kingdom (AnPl, 7pm) Season Premiere – Kicking off with a look at otters.
  • Academy of Country Music Awards (CBS, 8pm) – Reba MacEntire and Blake Shelton host.
  • The Kennedys (Reelz, 8pm) Mini series Premiere – Katie Holmes and Greg Kinnear finally found an air date.
  • The Borgias (Show, 9pm) Series Premiere – Jeremy Irons takes the title role in this kick off of soapy period drama.
  • The Killing (AMC, 9pm) Series Premiere – Adaptation of a Danish crime drama looking at a crime from multiple points of view.
  • Last Cake Standing (Food, 10pm) Season Premiere – Let the caking begin.
  • Strange Sex (TLC, 10pm) Season Premiere – A look at sexual things of the irregular.

The procrastinator lists items that may not be on your regular season pass, though notation does not imply recommendation other than those underlined. Times noted are typically PST.

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new and noteworthy tv: 3/21-3/27

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I really could start reading more with this lineup of new shows…

Monday

  • Dancing with the Stars (ABC, 8pm) Season Premiere – Kirstie Alley and Ralph Macchio are two of the people I’ve heard of.
  • American Pickers (Hist, 9pm) Season Premiere – Friends travel round looking for yard sales and whatnot.
  • Southern Fried Stings (Tru, 10pm) Season Premiere – Tracking down troublemakers.

Tuesday

  • Best in Film (ABC, 9pm) – The best film ever made?
  • Big Brian (Tru, 10pm) Series Premiere – An estate sale supervisor looks for good stuff.
  • The Fabulous Beekman Boys (PlGr, 10pm) Season Premiere – The gents return with their farm.
  • Marcel’s Quantum Kitchen (Syfy, 10pm) Series Premiere – One of the former Top Chef contestants does something in the kitchen.

Wednesday

  • Fact or Faked (Syfy, 10pm) Season Premiere – Haunted schmaunted.

Thursday

  • Hard Times of RJ Berger (MTV, 11pm) Season Premiere – Another season of… ok I don’t really know more than this show is about a well endowed but awkward teen.
  • John Oliver’s New York Stand-up (Com, 11:59pm) Season Premiere – I’d say that someone named John Oliver hosts Stand-up in New York.

Friday

  • Shark Tank (ABC, 8pm) Season Premiere – Inventions with potential, and with mocking, return.

Saturday

  • NCAA Basketball (Various) – It looks like regional finals are on, but not entirely sure when final, finals are, good thing I didn’t join the pool.

Sunday

  • Mildred Pierce (HBO, 9pm) Mini-series Premiere – Kate Winslet plays the lead in this depression era adaptation.
  • Amazing Wedding Cakes (WE, 10pm) Season Premiere – I don’t know that I’d really do a theme wedding cake…

The procrastinator lists items that may not be on your regular season pass, though notation does not imply recommendation other than those underlined. Times noted are typically PST.

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new and noteworthy tv: 3/14-3/20

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Aside from some new reality there’s also tons of NCAA basketball which I figured sports enthusiasts knew where all the games were.

Monday

  • Wedding Wars/Beverly Hills Fabulous (VH1, 9/10pm) Series Premieres – Couple compete and then spend time with a salon.
  • Meat & Potatoes (Food, 10pm) Season Premiere – A look at some all-American meat.

Tuesday

  • Roast of Donald Trump (Com, 10:30) – Let the hair jokes fly.
  • Four of a Kind (Life, 11pm) Series Premiere – Following 17 year old quadruplets.

Wednesday

  • Deathwish Movers (Trav, 10pm) Series Premiere – Moving in Boston isn’t always easy.
  • Storage Wars (A&E, 10:30pm) Season Premiere – Will winning be worth it?

Thursday

  • Blonde vs Bear (AnPl, 10pm) Series Premiere – Bear protector tries to keep it less confrontational.
  • Manhunters (A&E, 10pm) Season Premiere – The fugitive task force kicks in.

Friday

  • Supernanny (ABC, 8pm) Series Finale – Before she hangs up her hat can she help one more family.

Saturday

  • The Pee-Wee Herman Show on Broadway (HBO, 10pm) – I know you are but what am I?

Sunday

  • Big Love (HBO, 9pm) Series Finale – Season one is in my queue.

The procrastinator lists items that may not be on your regular season pass, though notation does not imply recommendation other than those underlined. Times noted are typically PST.

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