tv

new and noteworthy tv: 7/26-8/1

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Monday

  • Top Gear (BBCA, 6pm) Season Premiere – A Porsche, a Jaguar, and a Chrysler…
  • Bachelorette (ABC, 8pm) – The men tell all… are the men less catty?

Tuesday

  • Breakthrough with Tony Robbins (NBC, 8pm) Series Premiere – Tony tries to help out folks making changes in their lives.
  • Masterchef (Fox, 9pm) Series Premiere – More wannabe chefs compete to go pro.
  • The Colony (Disc, 10pm) Season Premiere – Another season of real folks who agree to live in a place with a fake viral apocalypse.
  • Growing Up Twisted (A&E, 10/10:30pm) Series Premiere – We tag along with Twister Sister front man Dee and his family.

Wednesday

  • Plain Jane (CW, 9pm) Series Premiere – Will makeovers and dating tips make these ladies confessions of crushes a success?

Thursday

  • Project Runway/On the Road with Austin & Santino (Life, 9/10:30pm) Season/Series Premiere – First another season of competitors and then two former contestants design looks for real life ladies.
  • Jersey Shore (MTV, 10pm) Season Premiere – The gang heads to Miami and I still can’t care.

Friday

  • Say Yes to the Dress: Atlanta (TLC, 9:30pm) Series Premiere – It’s like Say Yes to the Dress, but it’s set in… Atlanta.

Saturday

  • X Games (Various) – Let the games begin… ok so it’s actually starting Thursday and running through Sunday… the X Games head to LA, so check in for lots of hours of coverage on all the ESPNs including: ESPN, ESPN2, ESPN International, ESPN.com\action, ESPN Classic, ESPN3.com, and SportsCenter.

Sunday

  • Rubicon (AMC, 8/9pm) Series Premiere – The latest drama brings some code crackers to our conspiracies.
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new and noteworthy tv: 7/19-7/25

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Monday

  • Do Something Awards (VH1, 9pm) – Jane Lynch hosts the honoring of folks for accomplishments other than celebrity.
  • Rupaul’s Drag U (Logo, 9pm) Series Premiere – What’s better than a Drag Queen to get some ladies to get some style going on.
  • Fabulous Cake (TLC, 10pm) Series Premiere – Start the season by touring three top bakeries in Vegas.

Tuesday

  • I’m Pregnant And… (Health, 9pm) Season Premiere – The season starts off with a woman who has a 50-50 chance of her child being a dwarf.
  • Teen Mom/If You Really Knew Me (MTV, 10/11pm) Season/Series Premiere – Check in with the teen moms and then catch teens that are breaking down the walls between cliques.

Wednesday

  • Confessions: Animal Hoarding (AnPl, 9pm) Series Premiere – A mix of hoarding and animal rescue?
  • Pros vs Joes (Spike, 10pm) Season Premiere – NBA vs NFL in a basketball challenge.

Thursday

  • Time to catch up on some Tour, or perhaps some summer series, or perhaps a good book!

Friday

  • Your Chance to Dance (CMT, 9pm) Series Premiere – Dance baby, dance.
  • The Pillars of the Earch (Starz, 10pm) – This miniseries kicks off with an adaptation of the 1989 book.

Saturday

  • Being Human (BBCA, 10pm) Season Premiere – A werewolf, a vampire, and a ghost… what more could fans want?

Sunday

  • Tour de France (Vs, various) – It’s been a long couple weeks for these guys and it’s put some wear and tear on those watching as well, so let’s see who rides into Paris with the yellow, and white, and green, and polka dot, and of course a final sprint stage win.
  • I Survived… (Bio, 9pm) Season Premiere – This series should probably be hopeful that folks survive but I find it super creepy the things that almost kill them.
  • Mad Men (AMC, 10pm) Season Premiere – I’ve missed too many of these, on my list to check out on dvd.
  • My Boys (TBS, 10pm) Season Premiere – This show looks perfectly pleasant, but what with it starting when my cable was out I’ve never caught an episode.
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tv

new and noteworthy tv: 7/12-7/18

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Monday

  • Scooby-Doo: Mystery Inc (Cart, 7pm) Series Premiere – They’re back, and solving mysteries again.
  • Samantha Brown’s Asia (Trav, 8pm) Series Premiere – First stop Thailand.
  • The Closer/Rizzoli & Isles (TNT, 9/10pm) Season/Series Premiere – Can Angie Harmon and her new crime solving buddy follow the Deputy Chief, so far the critics say no but I’ll give it a shot.
  • Rob Dyrdek’s Fantasy Factory (MTV, 9:30pm) Season Premiere – With a skate board base camp and a budget what will this guy do next?

Tuesday

  • White Collar/Covert Affairs (USA, 9/10pm) Season/Series Premiere – Con artist and FBI agent together again, and then we meet the newest CIA operative as Piper Perabo starts her fieldwork, I’m always game to see if someone can be the new Sydney Bristow.

Wednesday

  • Lucy Must Be Traded (ABC, 8pm) – Who would have guessed the Peanuts gang would have issues playing baseball?
  • Espys (ESPN, 9pm) – Seth Meyers hosts the latest honoring of sports performers.
  • Ghost Hunters International (Syfy, 9pm) Season Premiere – The global gang looks for Robin Hood, you know his ghost.
  • Chasing Mummies (Hist, 10pm) Series Premiere – Following an archaeologist, like Indiana Jones I’m sure.
  • Psych (USA, 10pm) Season Premiere – The fake psychic and his sidekick are solving crimes for another season.

Thursday

  • Mary Knows Best (Syfy, 9pm) Series Premiere – What professional are we not following with a reality series? Psychic.

Friday

  • The Jensen Project (NBC, 8pm) – A family from a secret genius society tries to thwart evil, this looks like either a made for tv movie or a series that wasn’t picked up.
  • Man, Woman, Wild (Disc, 9pm) Series Premiere – A couple faces dangers like snakes in the amazon.
  • DC Cupcakes (TLC, 10pm) Series Premiere – Isn’t there already a cupcake baking reality series?

Saturday

  • Celebrity Ghost Stories/My Ghost Story (Bio, 9/10pm) Season/Series Premiere – ‘Famous’ and not famous folks share their stories of ghosts.
  • Pit Boss (AnPl, 10pm) Season Premiere – The dog savers are back.

Sunday

  • 24 Hour Restaurant Battle (Food, 10pm) Series Premiere – Competing by opening a restaurant in 24 hours.
  • Strange Sex (TLC, 10/10:30pm) Season Premiere – It’s what it sounds like, a series about sex, first stop older women, younger men, then a woman thinking herself into her own climactic moment.
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new and noteworthy tv: 7/5-7/11

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Monday

  • The Bachelorette (ABC, 8pm) – I saw a promo and Vienna cries so the breakup talk must be serious.
  • Anthony Bourdain: No Reservations (Trav, 10pm) Season Premiere – Tasting travels.

Tuesday

  • Warehouse 13 (Syfy, 9pm) Season Premiere – Supernatural artifacts can be trouble in the wrong hands.
  • Primetime (ABC, 10pm) Season Premiere – Family secrets.

Wednesday

  • Come Dine With Me/The Choir (BBCA, 9/10pm) Series Premieres – A competition to see who is the hostess with the mostess, or something, and then it’s like Glee but real.

Thursday

  • Big Brother (CBS, 8pm) Season Premiere – I still can’t believe this show is still going.

Friday

  • Eureka/Haven (Syfy, 9/10pm) Season/Series Premiere – The quirky characters take their science to the next level and the sheriff who tries to keep them all in check, and then a new supernatural FBI agent series based on King’s Colorado Kid.

Saturday

  • The Bridge (CBS, 8pm) Series Premiere – I haven’t heard anything about this latest crime series, oh except it’s Canadian, I’ll check out an ep.
  • How Do I Look? (Style, 8pm) Season Premiere – The Jersey styling continues, or un-Jersey styling in this instance.

Sunday

  • Ochocinco/The TO Show (VH1, 9/10:30pm) Series/Season Premiere – Some guy from sports and Dancing with the Stars looks for love and then some sports guys deals with sports guy things.
  • The Glades (A&E, 10pm) Series Premiere – A Chicago cop is exiled to Florida, who knows which is the cop drama that’ll stick.
  • Children’s Hospital (Adult Swim, 10:30pm) Series Premiere – This Rob Corddry created web series is getting a run on cable including some new episodes, now I need to find out if I get AdultSwim.
  • Kid in a Candy Store (Food, 10:30pm) Series Premiere – A look at sweets wherever they may be.
  • Russel Simmons Presents: Stand-Up at the El Rey (Com, 11;30pm) Series Premiere – Comedy showcase.
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new and noteworthy tv: 6/28-7/4

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Monday

  • Huge/Make It or Break It (ABCFam, 9/10pm) Series/Season Premiere – The family network brings us kids at weight loss camp and then another season of gymnastics.
  • Intervention/Obsessed (A&E, 9/10pm) Season Premieres – Stepping in with addicts and psychological issues.

Tuesday

  • Rescue Me/Louie (Fx, 10/11/11:30pm) Season/Series Premiere – Fire drama returns and then cringe worthy Louie plays a version of himself that tries to make us laugh, either with or at him.

Wednesday

  • Locked Up Abroad (NGC, 10pm) Season Premiere – The season opens with the ‘real’ midnight express.
  • Man Shops Globe (Sund, 10pm) Season Premiere – Thailand markets.
  • The Real World (MTV, 10pm) Season Premiere – Eight strangers, blah, blah, blah… New Orleans.

Thursday

  • Ace of Cakes (Food, 10pm) Season Premiere – 100 episodes and a rollercoaster cake.

Friday

  • America Celebrates July 4th (ABC, 9pm) – It may seem weird that this is showing on the 2nd but it was taped June 6. June

Saturday

  • Tour de LanceFrance (Vs, multiple times) – Starts now through July 25, tune in for another year of drama (and let’s hope it’s all in the race).
  • Wimbledon (NBC, 6am) – Saturday and Sunday bring the women’s and men’s finals following a week of network coverage.

Sunday

  • Macy’s 4th of July Fireworks Spectacular (NBC, 9pm); Boston Pops Fireworks Spectacular (CBS, 10pm); A Capitol Fourth (PBS, 8pm) – Pick your fireworks spectacular.
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tv

new and noteworthy tv: 6/21-6/27

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Monday

  • Unusual Suspects (ID, 7pm) Series Premiere – Normal people shocking crimes.
  • Saving Grace (TNT, 9pm) Series Finale – Grace has had a bumpy road so let’s see what Earl and his big boss have in store for the end of the show.
  • Ultimate Car Build Off/Heartland Thunder (Disc, 9/10pm) Season/Series Premieres – Minivans with oomph and race cars that race.
  • Inedible to Incredible (TLC, 10/10:30pm) Series Premiere – Questionable culinary creations or delectable dinners?

Tuesday

  • Wipeout/Downfall/Primetime (ABC, 8/9/10pm) Season/Series Premiere – Game shows where people fall, prizes fall, and then non game show about people who are weird.
  • HawthoRNe/Memphis Beat (TNT, 9/10pm) Season/Series Premiere – The RN that cares but clashes with others series returns (I gave Jada a chance) and then we get a a Southern charmer of a detective (I’ll give Jason Lee a chance).

Wednesday

  • Jimmy Kimmel (ABC, 10pm) – Is it just my imagination or is Kimmel taking over the specials, Lost, then Lakers, and now… Twilight.

Thursday

  • Rookie Blue/Boston Med (ABC, 9/10pm) Series Premieres – Officers new on the job, looks average but worth a summer shot, and then a real life look at folks in Boston hospitals.
  • Futurama (Com, 10pm) Season Premiere – It’s back as the straight to dvd films air as new seasons.
  • Raising Sextuplets (WE, 10pm) Season Premiere – They’re two, or is that twelve?

Friday

  • Netflix?

Saturday

  • AFI Lifetime Achievement Awards (TVL, 9pm) – Mike Nichols is honored.

Sunday

  • BET Awards (BET, 8pm) – Queen Latifah hosts the tribute to musicians, actors, and entertainers.
  • Daytime Emmy Awards (CBS, 9pm) – Regis hosts the salute to the the folks that entertain during the daytime, but you’ll have to stay up until nighttime to watch.
  • Ellen’s Somewhat Special Special/Conan’s Writers Live (TBS, 9/10pm) – Comedy hosted by Ellen and then continued by Conan’s writers.
  • Hung/Entourage (HBO, 10/10:30pm) Season Premiere – The man whoring and entertainment whoring continue.
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new and noteworthy tv: 6/14-6/20

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Well I’ve knocked my dvr down to under 30% filled, should still be safe from being maxed out with this week’s highlights.

Monday

  • Warren the Ape (MTV, 10:30pm) Series Premiere – Fictional reality show?

Tuesday

  • Kathy Griffin: My Life on the D-List/Double Exposure (Brav, 9pm) Season/Series Premiere – Kathy hits L&O:SVU and then a photographing duo start their pics with Eve.

Wednesday

  • TV’s Greatest Surprises (CBS, 8pm) – Jeff Probst hosts moments that I can only assume are thought to be surprising.
  • Top Chef (Brav, 9pm) Season Premiere – Chef Eric Ripert joins the judges for another season.
  • Bert the Conqueror (Trav, 8:30pm) Series Premiere – An adventurer starts seeing Utah sites.
  • Hot In Cleveland (TVL, 10pm) Series Premiere – Valerie Bertinelli, Jane Leeves, and Wendie Malick join Betty White in Cleveland.

Thursday

  • Better Off Ted (ABC, 8/8:30pm) – A couple more chances to enjoy this funny but canceled show.

Friday

  • Miley Cyrus (ABC, 8pm) – Isn’t she retired yet?
  • Battle of the Wedding Designers (TLC, 10pm) Series Premiere – Three teams compete to create a couple’s magical day.

Saturday

  • Last Chance Highway (AnPl, 5pm) Series Premiere – Saving doggies.

Sunday

  • Leverage (TNT, 9pm) Season Premiere – This campy caper show returns for another season of fighting the good fight.
  • Scoundrels/The Gates (ABC, 9/10pm) Series Premieres – These two show’s previews look on the campy side, but maybe not good campy, a family of criminals and a community of, vampires?
  • The Tudors/The Real L Word (Show, 9/10pm) Series Finale/Premiere – The series wraps up as a new begins, following six lesbians.
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new and noteworthy tv: 6/7-6/13

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Looks like I’ll have more time to finish off Six Feet Under…

Monday

  • Last Comic Standing/Persons Unknown (NBC, 8/10pm) Season/Series Premiere – Comic competition, and then a series being plugged as a miniseries so perhaps it won’t get canceled mid-mystery.
  • Behind the Music (VH1, 8pm) Season Premiere – Haven’t you always wondered if there was more to DMX than meets the eye?
  • The Secret Life of the American Teenager (ABCFam, 8pm) Season Premiere – More pregnancy?
  • American Pickers/Pawn Star$ (Hist, 9/10pm) Season Premieres – Studebaker, motorcycle, and Ford truck among other finds.
  • Last American Cowboy (AnPl, 10pm) Series Premiere – The latest reality starts with Montana ranchers.
  • Neighbors from Hell (TBS, 10pm) Series Premiere – This new animated series finds a family visiting from Hell posing as a normal suburban family.
  • Dance Your Ass Off (Oxy, 11pm) Season Premiere – Mel B takes over as host as folks try fitness to the beat.

Tuesday

  • Pretty Little Liars (ABCFam, 8pm) Series Premiere – The posters make me want this to be like a Heathers, but I doubt it will be.

Wednesday

  • CMT Music Awards (CMT, 7/8pm) – Kid Rock hosts, I forgot he was country now.
  • Man v. Food (Trav, 10pm) Season Premiere – I don’t know why if you are going to eat a lot of steak you’d want to do it fast.
  • You’re Cut Off/Bridal Bootcamp (VH1, 9/10pm) Series Premieres – Watch the real life privileged suffer, then watch brides suffer for their goal: dream weddings.
  • The Singing Bee (CMT, 10:30pm) Season Premiere – Karaoke competition anyone?
  • Work of Art (Brav, 11pm) Series Premiere – Fourteen rising artists compete for art stuff.

Thursday

  • Bethenny’s Getting Married (Brav, 10pm) Series Premiere – Spinning off from housewives means this is another show I can just skip.
  • Penn & Teller/The Green Room with Paul Provenza (Show, 10/10:30pm) Season/Series Premiere – First mocking of cheerleaders and then more general mocking with a round table of comedians.

Friday

  • Fifa World Cup Kick-Off Celebration Concert (ABC, 8pm) – Alicia Keyes, Black Eyed Peas… more music.
  • Dual Survival (Disc, 10pm) Series Premiere – This reality series starts with a couple folks shipwrecked.
  • The Whitest Kids u’ Know (IFC, 11pm) Season Premiere – Sketch comedy anyone?
  • Glenn Martin DDS (Nick, 10:30pm) Season Premiere – Brett Michaels continues his overbooking with a voice over on this show.

Saturday

  • The Jaquie Brown Diaries (Logo, 10:30pm) Series Premiere – New Zealand celebrity plays herself.

Sunday

  • Tony Awards (CBS, 8pm) – Sean Hayes hosts.
  • Unnatural History (Cart, 8pm) Series Premiere – Live action mystery in DC.
  • True Blood (HBO, 9pm) Season Premiere – There’s blood, and its true.
  • Cupcake Wars (Food, 10pm) Series Premiere – Not sure this needs much elaboration, although lest you think it’s an actual war, it’s just a cupcake making competition.
  • HGTV Design Star/Color Splash (HGTV, 10/11pm) Season Premieres – Goes from white to color.
  • Kourtney & Khloe Take Miami/Holly’s World (E!, 10pm) Season Premiere – Enough with the reality stars already…
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new and noteworthy tv: 5/31-6/6

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Most of the network shows are off but there’s always some cable action to keep you entertained. Procrastinator picks are underlined.

Monday

  • The Best Thing I Ever Ate (Food, 9pm) Season Premiere – Grill it up.
  • Cake Boss (TLC, 9pm) Season Premiere – They cake for others they cake for themselves.
  • Brett Michals Life as I Know It/Dad Camp (VH1, 10pm) Series Premieres – A preview into the series that will look at Brett at home which I fear is not just l a lot of rest for him then some new dads get some training.
  • True Beauty (ABC, 10pm) Season Premiere – Ten folks are judges on their inner beauty, whilst thinking they are competing on their outer beauty.

Tuesday

  • America’s Got Talent (NBC, 8pm) Season Premiere – Howie Mandel replaces the Hoff at the judges table for the latest crop of random ‘talent’,
  • Hell’s Kitchen (Fox, 8pm) Season Premiere – More competing, more yelling.
  • One Big Happy Family/The Little Couple (TLC, 9/9:30/10pm) Season Premieres – People do things.
  • Jersey Couture (Oxy, 10pm) Series Premiere – Getting on board with the Jersey reality trend we follow a family who runs a dress shop.
  • Losing It With Jillian (NBC, 10pm) Series Premiere – The bitchy trainer from Loser takes on families where they live.
  • Downtown Girls (MTV, 11pm) Series Premiere – Another reality look at folks not doing stuff, this focuses on girls in downtown NY.

Wednesday

  • Are We There Yet? (TBS, 9pm) Series Premiere – Ice Cube takes this film of blended family to the small screen.
  • Ghost Hunters Academy (Syfy, 9pm) Season Premiere – How many ghost hunting series are there?
  • Tosh.0 (Com, 10:30pm) Season Premiere – Hosting another round of web comedy whatnot.
  • Half Pint Brawlers (Spike, 11pm) Series Premiere – Little person wrestling.

Thursday

  • Burn Notice/Royal Pains (USA, 9pm) Season Premieres – More spy shenanigans and medical machinations.
  • NBA Finals (ABC, 6/8:30/9pm pst) – Let the games begin, followed by a special post show, and special Kimmel.

Friday

  • Scripps National Spelling Bee (ABC, 8pm) – Can you use the word in a sentence please?
  • Flashpoint (CBS, 9pm) Season Premiere – The Canadian SRU tactical team is back for another season of saves.
  • The Neistat Brothers (HBO, 11:59pm) Series Premiere – The series follows the brothers and their short films.

Saturday

  • Three Rivers (CBS, 8pm) – Dusting off this canned show for a little burn off.

Sunday

  • Bridezillas (WE, 8/9pm) Season Premieres – Goth and Vegas weddings.
  • Drop Dead Diva (Life, 9pm) Season Premiere – Our funny model protagonist now in a lawyer’s body faces disbarment.
  • Ice Road Truckers/Top Shot (Hist, 9/10pm) Season Premiere – New truckers and then shooters.
  • MTV Movie Awards/The Hard times of RJ Berger (MTV, 9pm) Series Premiere – Aziz Ansari hosts and then the latest scripted offering, a coming of age story of a gentleman who is well endowed.
  • The Next Food Network Star (Food, 9pm) Season Premiere – Who is camera ready?
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new and noteworthy tv: 5/24-5/30

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Is it time to switch from tv shows to tv shows via Netflix?

Monday

  • HIMYM/Rules of Engagement/2 1/2 Men/Big Bang Theory/CSI: Miami (CBS, 8-11pm) Season Finales – Laugh, almost laugh, kind of laugh, laugh, and then random David Caruso.
  • 24 (Fox, 8pm) Series Finale – There’s still talk of a movie say Jack probably doesn’t die, but some other people probably will.
  • Chuck/Law & Order (NBC, 8/10pm) Season/Series Finale – Two hours of Chuck kicking some Ring ass, Chuck-style then there will be plenty of Law & Orders, and of course repeats, to fill this gap but get ready to say goodbye to the originator of the chung chung.
  • 10 Things I Hate About You (ABCFam, 8/8:30pm) Series Finale – I guess they’ve run through all ten things.
  • The Bachelorette (ABC, 9pm) Season Premiere – That girl who was on the Bachelor but left and tried to come back tries to pick some dudes.

Tuesday

  • The Biggest Loser/Parenthood (NBC, 8pm) Season Finale – One of the losers wins and then I’ve been sucked back into Parenthood, who can resist Lauren Graham?
  • NCIS/NCIS LA/The Good Wife (CBS, 8/9/10pm) Season Finale – Blah, blah, and then my favorite new drama continues to balance great characters, courtroom drama, and political intrigue.
  • Dancing with the Stars (ABC, 9pm) Season Finale – Following Tuesday’s performances the latest winner is crowned.

Wednesday

  • American Idol (Fox, 8pm) Season Finale – Following Tuesday’s final performances we pick the final two and say bye to Simon hopefully in only the two hours and seven minutes scheduled.
  • Criminal Minds/CSI: NY (CBS, 9/10pm) Season Finales – Death and criminals.

Thursday

  • Flash Forward/Hollywood Salutes Matt Damon (ABC, 8/9pm) Series Finale – Say goodbye to the visions and then for some reason we’re saluting Matt Damon.
  • So You Think You Can Dance (Fox, 8pm) Season Premiere – Dance baby dance.
  • 100 Questions (NBC, 8:30pm) Series Premiere – Not a gameshow, it’s a sitcom where folks flash back to questions answered on a dating survey.
  • Police Women of Memphis/Mall Cops (TLC, 9/10pm) Season/Series Premiere – And more of these…
  • The OCD Project (VH1, 10pm) Series Premiere – What happens when you put OCD folks in a house together and things start getting real?

Friday

  • Past Life (Fox, 8pm) – Time to burn off this long ago canceled show.

Saturday

  • Red Dead Redemption (Fox, 11:59pm) – Video game comes to life.

Sunday

  • National Memorial Day Concert (PBC, 8pm) – Gary Sinise and Joe Mantegna host the tribute to the military featuring Lionel Richie and Brad Paisley.
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