next week 3/23

New and notable in the week ahead… procrastinator picks are underlined.

Monday

  • Roommates (ABCFam, 9pm) Series Premiere – A new roomie moves in to the NYC apartment to follow an old crush.
  • Sophie (ABCFam, 9:30pm) Series Premiere – Is a ‘sucky year’ for this single mom talent manager funny, or not?
  • Table for 12 (TLC, 10/10:30pm) Series Premiere – For those who are a fan of John & Kate plus 8, these folks have upped the game to 2 plus 10.

Tuesday

  • Presidential Address (Mult Networks, 8pm) – Obama is back for more.
  • College Hill (BET, 7/7:30pm) Season Premiere – We’re back with these real life eight college kids in South Beach.
  • NCIS/The Mentalist (CBS, 9/10pm) – Special times for our crime fighters.

Wednesday

  • American Idol (Fox, 8pm) – Idol is shifting to a Wed/Thurs presentation to give Obama some space on Tues, this week Motown, go Adam!
  • Survivor (CBS, 8pm) – A special night and time to recap the first fifteen days.

Thursday

  • In the Motherhood (ABC, 8pm) Series Premiere – Megan Mullally, Jessica St Clair, and Cheryl Hines are mothers making funny in this update of a web series followed by the return of Samantha Who? in a new time slot.

Friday

  • NCAA Basketball (CBS, 4pm) – In case you’ve missed it the NCAA playoffs are cooking, tonight you can catch some regional playoffs.

Saturday

  • Nickelodeon Kids’ Choice Awards (Nick, 8pm) – Dwayne (no longer the Rock) Johnson hosts, and last I heard at least Chris Brown won’t be there.
  • World Figure Skating Championships (NBC, 9pm) – In case you’re getting geared up for next year’s Olympics or just like the spinning.

Sunday

  • The No. 1 Ladies Detective Agency (HBO, 8pm) Series Premiere – Jill Scotts plays the lead in this adaptation of the novel series set in Botswana, which I hear is delightful, the series that is.
  • Any Dream Will Do (BBCA, 8pm) Series Premiere – Who will win the lead in Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat.
  • G4 Underground (G4, 9pm) Series Premiere – Getting the real dirt on amateur porn and real life costumed superheroes.
  • Little Dorrit (PBS, 9pm) – Kicking off the latest Masterpiece Miniseries in this Dickens presentation.

* Times noted are PST, always check your local listings.

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finally more gossip

Well it seems like it has been forever since we’ve seen a new ep but tonight we are back in business. If you recall Serena and Dan broke up, yet again. Was it their different plans for college, she no longer Yale bound, or was it that Dan was doing his teacher? Really I’m not sure they ever give a real reason for the breaks and reunited loves but let’s just leave them apart for now.

And yes Dan was accused of having an affair with the new teacher, who was fired and then they actually started having an affair… woo hoo. And then since folks realized they didn’t have any proof of her inappropriate behavior she’s getting hired back. How inappropriate.

This whole situation was brought about by our delightful Blair who was out to get Teach for first giving her a bad grade and then reporting her for trying to get Teach back… Now this would be normal drama if B didn’t lose her slot at Yale over the whole deal, and of course the respect of dear old dad.

Now B has finally given up on Chuck, so we think, though Chuck may be straightening out after his dad’s death. He’s gone off on an international bender and returned to lose Dad’s company to his less than reputable uncle. But Uncle lost his legal guardianship when Chuck finally allied with the woman he blamed for his dad’s death new adopted mom Lily Vanderwoodsen.

Though we’ve learned that trying to take over the company isn’t Uncle’s only misdeed… we learned that he offered Blair a little comfort whilst Chuck was on the bender and she’s doing all she can to keep this quiet. We all know nothing stays quiet for long.

As for the rest of the crew, Vanessa and Nate have been cozy and dull, Little J and Eric are mostly out of the limelight, while their folks Lily and Rufus are all hooked up. And of course we shouldn’t forget that Lily and Rufus’ kid is still out there though they believe him to be dead per the new adoptive folks. What we’ll gossip about next is anyone’s guess.

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next week 3/16

New and notable in the week ahead… procrastinator picks are underlined.

Monday

  • Kyle XY (ABC Fam, 9pm) Series Finale – Things wrap up as Kyle tries to thwart a bad plan.
  • Dhani Tackles the Globe (Trav, 9pm) Series Premiere – NFL linebacker heads to Bangkok to do some Muay Thai.
  • Battlestar Galactica (Sci Fi, 10pm) I’m only on about season two but this finale special salutes the series as it wraps.

Tuesday

  • Modern Toss (IFC, 11pm) Series Debut – A partially animated British comedy is apparently not for the easily offended.

Wednesday

  • Inside the FBI (Disc, 8pm) – Following the FBI…
  • Better Off Ted (ABC, 8:30pm) Series Premiere – Sitcom set in an ethically challenged R&D co with Jay Harrington and Portia de Rossi, follows Scrubs in its new time slot.

Thursday

  • Taking the Stage (MTV, 10pm) Series Debut – Real life Fame, students at the School for Creative Performing Arts.

Friday

  • Battlestar Galactica (SciFi, 9pm) Series Finale – The series may be done, but you can always stay tuned for Caprica.
  • Head Case (Starz, 10pm) Season Premiere – This improvised original comedy showcases a therapist to the stars.
  • Party Down (Starz, 10:30pm) Series Debut – Comedy with actors catering or catering actors… by VMars creator Rob Thomas.

Saturday

  • The Locator (WE, 9pm) Season Premiere – Real life looking for people all season long.
  • Nora Roberts (Life, 1pm) – Start the marathon of movies based on her books with Blue Smoke and work your way through Carolina Moon, Montana Sky, Angels Fall and the latest, Northern Lights at 9.

Sunday

  • BNP Paribas Open (CSNBA, 12pm) – The men’s and women’s tennis finals following earlier rounds throughout the week.

* Always check your local listings (times noted are PST).

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idol… the final 13

Between what America wants and what the judges want we’ve rounded out our thirteen finalists! And we’ll get to watch them week after week, after week. For those who don’t recall now we start the theme weeks which are a challenge for some, we’ll continue to hear lots of comments on the importance of song choice. Tonight we’ll hear the work of Michael Jackson. The format mostly keeps to Tuesday performances and Wednesday results (with ridiculous group numbers and dragged out results).

Of the competitors I predict Broadway boy Adam to go far along with MJB singer Lil, though admittedly Danny’s a crowd favorite. But what’s good about this stage is still the surprises, one of our favorites will tend to get flat week after week and one of the less known kids will start to wow with strong week after week performances. We hope. What’s bad about this stage is the kids that just don’t have the chops and having to hear them for weeks too many, as the worst one usually isn’t even the one voted off. Let’s hope Megan Quirkery and Anoop Dawg find a way to work it.

And yes it’s all up to America now. We do hear from each of our now four judges as to what they think, we’re agreeing with Paula that four judges may be too many but Cara is doing a good job with sensical comments. Though I would miss Paula’s slurring non sequiturs and her interplay with Simon should she not return next season. But for now it’s up to us to dial those numbers. The latest is that apparently they didn’t really plan to have that 13th contestant (at least not soon enough) because the usual telephone number format digits are only secured 01-12 and the version with ’13’ dials phone sex, whoops. We’ll have special digits tonight, use them or you can’t complain about who gets kicked off. Oh sure you can, it’s the American way.

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next week 3/9

New and notable in the week ahead… procrastinator picks are underlined.

Monday

  • Dancing with the Stars (ABC, 8pm) Season Premiere – Jewel and Nancy O’Dell are out, and I hear at least one is being replaced by Holly, one of the Girls Next Door.
  • Battles BC (Hist, 9pm) Series Premiere – Were you wondering what really happened in ancient clashes, I mean what tactics did they really use?
  • Castle (ABC, 10pm – repeats Sunday) Series Premiere – It’s a straight-laced cop paired with not so by the book writer, with Nathan Fillion (Firefly/Dr Horrible) playing the writer I will of course tune in.

Tuesday

  • WCG Ultimate Gamer (SciFi, 10pm) Series Premiere – Twelve gamers move in together and compete at Rock Band 2, partay!

Wednesday

  • The Chopping Block (NBC, 8pm) Series Premiere – The guy who trained Gordon Ramsay has his own restaurant competition.
  • Ghost Hunters (SciFi, 9pm) Season Premiere – Clean your guns, or whatever the guys on Ghostbusters used, Ghost hunting season has started.
  • South Park (Com, 10pm) Season Premiere – Can these kids really be thirteen years older?

Thursday

  • Bridget’s Sexiest Beaches (Trav, 8pm) Series Debut – I can only assume we see sexy beaches with former Girl Next Door Bridget, the girls are happening this week.
  • Warriors (Hist, 10pm) Series Debut – Looks like we get to take a walk down memory lane and learn how to hold a sword among other things.

Friday

  • Batman (Cart, 8pm) Season Premiere – This is the animated one, no Christian Bale…

Saturday

  • Will Ferrell: You’re Welcome America (HBO, 9pm) – A Final Night with George W. Bush Live From Broadway… need I say more?
  • The Graham Norton Show (BBCA, 10pm) Season Premiere – Sarah Ferguson greets Graham for the season opener.

Sunday

  • Kings (NBC, 8pm) Series Premiere – It’s the fake country of Gilboa (in an alternate fake world) and it’s got a king, and I’m going to say some drama.
  • Tough Love Boot Camp (VH1, 10pm) Series Premiere – A matchmaker gives eight single gals a wakeup call on what they’re doing wrong when trying to find love.

* Always check your local listings (times noted are PST).

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america’s next top/make me a super…

So tonight saw the return of the fierce with Tyra and her gang at American’s Next Top Model, so me and my gang got together for a little dvr viewing. They spent the first hour narrowing it down to the final thirteen (who were of course already posted on the website) and giving a little personality, those girls can be bitches right off the bat. And then the competition began… Tyra did her bit by introducing a few odd looking girls, typical for modeling, and letting through the preacher, the epileptic, and the girl with severe scars from burns over much of her body.

So far we’re all liking blonde Celia the elder at 25, she’s smart, she’s into fashion, and she rolled her eyes at the right girl at the right time. We also like Aminat the lovely black gal with the fro, Fo the cute ‘blaxican’ with the freckles, and I have to say I kind of like the weird doe eyed girl. One thing I think I can go out on a limb and say is those forehead headbands should be eliminated for more than just the mark they leave on your head, can you say ugly. Thanks Mischa Barton for working that look to death.

The photo shoot of them playing childhood games was cute with some stiffness by a number of folks at this point. The runway walking also needs a ton of work by all, but overconfidence is always amusing superimposed over a near stumble and stop halfway down the runway before turning back by Sandra. I was surprised when Isabella even made it into the finals though when we realized she was the epileptic it made a little more sense. I have to say that when it came down to the final two I still thought that bitchy bad walk/bad photo Sandra might get the boot before her. But potential as a model and potential for drama won out.

Then when we flipped over to Make Me a Supermodel I wasn’t quite sure whether I was relieved or disappointed that it was a more straightforward modeling competition. They started narrowed down and got right to the first shoot, pairs in lingerie hanging in a clear box. The kids got back their photos and one winner, Salome, got to go on a go see. She didn’t earn the support of her peers by stating that she wanted to pick someone to go with her that she could beat. But of course no one got the booking.

And the first runway was more realistically just in front of the judges. Overall the field of men seemed stronger at first so it was surprising to see a chick win both the photo and the immunity with a handful of dudes in the bottom rungs. While I can barely remember who got immunity (Jordan), the sending home of thuggish dude over stiff androgynous guy was a no brainer. Everyone likes hot trained dancer Sandhurst to go far. Tyson and the new chick mentor Nicole (replacing Nikki) and the panel of judges don’t bring the same flair that Tyra and even Mr/Mrs Jay do, and again I’m not sure whether that’s a good thing or a bad thing.

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late night

I have to admit that I’m really not qualified to critique the first episode of Late Night with Jimmy Fallon since I have watched but really don’t watch any of the late shows regularly (Letterman, Leno, O’Brien, Kimmel, Ferguson, Daly…) I tuned in to the first show nonetheless. Now I think this is the sort of format where it will take some time to really see what the vibe and humor will be but I would be remiss not to judge, right?

The opener with Conan was cute, giving a nod to the start of a new late night show and the long road ahead and the fact that, for Conan, Leno’s not really going anywhere. The format of the rest of the show was pretty solid late night. The opening monologue introduced Fallon as well as his announcer and band The Root, which was pretty rockin’ and added a nice touch to slow jammin’ the news. Fallon has a boy next door quality about him, kind of sweet, kind of awkward, and kind of funny.

Having de Niro on as the first guest wasn’t the easiest rhythm to get going and acknowledging that he was a tough and letting him do a couple bits probably wasn’t worth the way it fed Fallon’s awkward trying hard to entertain shtick. Fortunately Timberlake’s casual style and song imitations lightened things up and and Van Morrison gave a needed breather to Fallon having to support the show.

Fallon still feels at his best when he’s doing bits, otherwise his communication is all a little too eager, but hopefully he’ll learn to use his eager to please mode in a less pleading and more comfortable way. And hopefully we’ll see Fallon develop his interviewing sea legs as the days, and weeks, go by. Although nothing about the first show would make me want to tune in again, there’s nothing that made me want to turn it off, which for a first show is probably a pretty huge triumph. The green room sponsor Bud Light with Lime was probably pleased enough.

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next week 3/2

New and notable in the week ahead… procrastinator picks are underlined.

Monday

  • The Bachelor (ABC, 8/10pm) Season Finale – Will the single father pick the blonde or the brunette? And will he change his mind, perhaps for returning Bachelorette DeAnna? After the Rose starts at 10 and continues in part two on Tuesday, will it be the most dramatic show yet?
  • Rules of Engagement (CBS, 9:30pm) Season Premiere – This show about folks at different stages of relationships with David Spade and Patrick Warburton among others, was one I found almost funny.
  • Ax Men (Hist, 10pm) Season Premiere – I think we look at more loggers… I think this is like the third logger show, maybe logging is that hot.
  • Harlem Heights (BET, 10/10:30pm) Series Premiere – This reality version follows folks in their twenties, in you guessed it, Harlem.
  • Saving Grace (TNT, 10pm) Season Premiere – Looks like Grace is still a mess and we love that about her, and now she has to break in new partner Christina Ricci, at least she won’t sleep with this partner, though I hate to rule anything out.
  • Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (NBC, 12:30am) – Will you tune in for De Niro and Timberlake or would you tune in for Fallon alone as he takes the desk.

Tuesday

  • Reaper (CW, 8pm) Season Premiere – This slacker dude whose soul has been sold to the devil and now has to be a bounty hunter for said devil developed a great cast and even some intrigue last season.

Wednesday

  • ANTM (CW, 8pm) Season Premiere – A two hour kick off brings 34 hopefuls down to 13 house dwellers, and then the mess continues with the first standard show.
  • Make Me A Supermodel (Bravo, 10pm) Season Premiere – For an alternate take on model wannabes check out Tyson hosting a crop of dudes and chicks who try to be fierce, or whatever that show’s catch phrase is.

Thursday

  • American Idol (Fox, 8pm) – In a special additional Thursday ep, the judges pick some favorites to try it again for the wild card slots.

Friday

  • Say Yes to the Dress (TLC, 10/10:30pm) Season Premiere – The process of picking a wedding gown, can’t wait!
  • Trick my Truck (CMT, 10pm) Season Premiere – A truck tricked in tribute to speedboats, woo hoo!

Saturday

  • Ashes to Ashes (BBCA, 9pm) Series Premiere – I’m not sure but this show sounds like Life on Mars but someone finds themselves in the 80s, oh wait it’s a sequel, to the BBC version of course.

Sunday

  • Cycling (Vs, 2pm) – Check out the guys at Paris Nice.
  • SNL (NBC, 7/8pm) – Game show parodies is followed by commercials.
  • The L Word (Show, 8/9pm) Series Finale – A special at 8 reviews the past seasons getting us all ready for the finale.
  • Sunday Best (BET, 9pm) Season Premiere – Undiscovered gospel singers.
  • Breaking Bad (AMC, 10pm) Season Premiere – The school teacher turned meth maker/dealer to support his family when he learns of his terminal cancer continues as he and his partner get into more messes – marathon to catch up on season 1 starting with the pilot at 8pm on Fri.
  • Keeping Up with the Kardashians (E!, 10pm) Season Premiere – Does anyone really care?
  • Candy Girls (E!, 10:30pm) Series Premiere – Eye candy for sale, well for rent, for music videos or whatever in this latest reality show.

* Always check your local listings, all times are PST.

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next week 2/23

New and notable in the week ahead…

Monday

  • The Bachelor (ABC, 8pm) – The women tell all…

Tuesday

  • Presidential Address (Various, 6pm) – Obama talks to a joint session of congress to outline challenges and proposed actions.
  • Dark Days in Monkey City (AnPl, 10pm) Series Premiere – Live action and animation for a couple species of monkeys.

Wednesday

  • American Idol (Fox, 8pm) – It’s on Wed and Thursday this week for the next round of twelve, so set the tivos, the results shows are definitely supposed to be fast forwarded through.

Thursday

  • Secrets of the Furious 5 (NBC, 8pm) – Apparently the guys from Kung Fu Panda are bringing another tale.
  • The Chris Isaak Hour (Bio, 7pm) Series Premiere – Trisha Yearwood joins Chris to kick off his show.

Friday

  • American Loggers (Disc, 10pm) Series Premiere – Timberrrrrrrr!

Saturday

  • America/Anacondas (Life/SciFi, 9pm) – Desperation may make you turn to an original telefilm…

Sunday

  • Saturday Night Live Just Shorts (NBC, 7pm) – Andy Samburg has brought some funny and hosts this compilation of the mostly not live portion of the show.
  • Running in Heels (Style, 8pm) Series Premiere – A look at fashion mag Marie Claire through various employees.
  • The Apprentice (NBC, 9pm) Season Premiere – Dennis Rodman, Joan Rivers, and a bevy of d listers take on Trumps tasks. 
  • Jesse Stone (CBS, 9pm) – ‘Thin Ice’ has Tom Selleck as Jesse Stone in the latest telefilm based on the Parker novels.
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keeping up

I’m not sure whether we’re still keeping up with the Joneses or if its now the Jobses, but it’s tough to keep up with technology. I may have noted that I broke down and bought a new flat screen tv. And when I got there they were having a special deal that included a blue ray player.

Well the blue ray was basically free, so what was I going to do, not take it? I wasn’t planning on upgrading from my standard dvd player even though the blue ray is the latest superior technology and quality of picture, but I did. Though I had to buy a new fancy hdmi cable which I was able to find online for about $35 rather than the $80 that the store versions were.

And now I have lovely television but am refraining from doing the next two steps which are 1) getting hd cable ($7/mo) and 2) getting a new hd tivo ($299-599 + $12.99/mo or $399 lifetime). I have been wanting a new tivo for ages because I still have an early series edition that can only record one channel at a time. But I also have a lifetime membership that only applies to my current box so not only would I have to buy a new box but I’d have to pay for the service.

So then my friend tells me about this new Roku ($100) that she got that enables you to watch netflix streaming. Why am I just watching videos stream on my laptop when I can watch them on my new 32 inch flat screen television? Well although I won’t get the sweet wireless connection I think I can just use another one of those fancy hdmi cables (or an rgb + audio cable). Though of course the new tivos — and xbox ($200) and some blue ray players ($350-400) — can also stream.

And now that we’re switching over to the digital television apparently I’m no longer able to get tv through my old vcr. I mean I know vcrs are basically like 8 track tape players, but it was keeping me going with just that one channel recording on my tivo. So I guess I could throw down for a dvd recorder ($100-250).

So what else could there be? Well, there is the iphone ($200-300 + $75-150/mo service)… but for now I will make do with my ipod and lame mobile phone with no internet/email. That is until they introduce something new and irresistible or my old one craps out. Isn’t that the way…

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